Help arranging a simpler piano version?

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Paul Frommer's
Language Workbook

[sìlronsem spä]

since ninth grade (I'm in 12th now) I've been arranging/playing soundtracks from movies by ear. Avatar is definitely one that deserves my attention. After looking around the forum and only finding really difficult versions, I decided to arrange a couple songs for those like me who have a hard time reading, but have a bad memory. I've started Jake's first flight, but it feels like the rhythm is off, somehow. can someone help me? here is what I have so far.
[/url]http://www.noteflight.com/scores/view/2be39b321ff507f336dcc0714875afd3a96ae6db[/url]

[Ikran Ahiyìk]

The memory capacity is really small for a normal person, so I decided to open a manualscript book, pick up a pen(cil), write down what you've heard from the soundtrack (of course you should process it a bit first, like checking if it's suitable for piano solo, then see if it's over the expected difficulty, sounds good or not on piano, etc. ...). By hand writing, it's more free than using software in this stage, especially when there are different voices...
Usually I can only remember several or 10-something notes after I've listened ten times repeating, and I have to keep humming it..

[sìlronsem spä]

Irayo, ma Ikran. The Rhythm has been fixed. for that part anyway. It is possible to play almost anything on a piano, I've tried.  and I'm much more fluent with [title]noteflight[title][/url]www.noteflight.com[/url] than pencil and paper for music. and you are definitely correct. there are many voices in the track, and i usually listen and memorize musical phrases for each of the individual voices, and then write them down. and then check them against the original sound, and then against what I have so far. It's coming along, but it's gonna take a while....