Eight's Random Need Help/Corrections Thread

[Eight]

Thought I'd post my Na'vi attempts in one thread instead of making new ones - keep the board tidy etc.

I'd be grateful if people could take a peek and maybe post any corrections and comments that would help me out.

Today's random sentence attempt is

ayoeng sngayä'i ftu sngä'itseng¹ a sìltsana tseng sngivä'i layu
we-PL-INCL start-FUT from starting-place which/that good place start-SUBJ/INFI will be.

¹ Made this up - based on sngä'ikrr (starting time). "Starting place" is a bit idiomatic maybe...

Or: Let us start at the very beginning, a very good place to start.

As always, props for spotting the reference. Even bigger props if you can tell me if I've used the preposition ftu correctly.

[Eight]

Something stupid for the evening. Not really checked this - in an effort to find out how much I can do without thinking too hard.

A: tsa'u ke tsranten. oe ngaru pivlltxe new. fi'u ritiri...

B: srane, eana riti le-Tipnai tsa'u lu. tsa'ul ngat ke rutxe srak.

A: oet rutxe srak. fi'u riti kerusey lu.

B: kehe. po... po hahaw.

[Taronyu]

ayoeng sngayä'i ftu sngä'itseng¹ a sìltsana tseng sngivä'i layu
we-PL-INCL start-FUT from starting-place which/that good place start-SUBJ/INFI will be.

¹ Made this up - based on sngä'ikrr (starting time). "Starting place" is a bit idiomatic maybe...

Or: Let us start at the very beginning, a very good place to start.

As always, props for spotting the reference. Even bigger props if you can tell me if I've used the preposition ftu correctly.

Looks good to me. Used ftu correctly.

Something stupid for the evening. Not really checked this - in an effort to find out how much I can do without thinking too hard.

A: tsa'u ke tsranten. oe ngaru pivlltxe new. fi'u ritiri...

B: srane, eana riti le-Tipnai tsa'u lu. tsa'ul ngat ke rutxe srak.

A: oet rutxe srak. fi'u riti kerusey lu.

B: kehe. po... po hahaw.

A. Need lu. I'd use oe-l, but that might be a matter of preference.
B. You're making an adjective out of a clan name? What? interesting use of rutxe I haven't seen yet...
A. Why the srak, if you're the object of please?
B. na'vi don't have ellipses.

[Eight]

B. You're making an adjective out of a clan name?

Somewhat sloppy way of mimicking the "Blue Norwegian [parrot]" of the original. It was "Te'lanä le-Na'vi" from The Weaving Song which made me wonder if it would work. Since I make a literal translation of that to be "Of Na'vi hearts'. So this was intended to be a "Blue Tipnai [stingbat]". Could be way off track but worth a shot.

A. Why the srak, if you're the object of please?

It's kind of rhetorical question thing - which I might have ballsed right up. In this case, the "Shop keeper" asks "Don't you like it?" and the response is "Like it? It's dead!" Or something. Lol.

B. na'vi don't have ellipses.

Damn you! Lol.

Cheers for the comments, mate. I have a tendancy to stretch beyond my abilities with language so it's great to have someone keeping an eye out.

[Txur’Itan]

-SNIP

B. na'vi don't have ellipses.

You have led my to think that all of the punctuation we have been using is highly debatable.  With grammar words like srak, pak or nang, it leads me to think that our use of punctuation of any kind is heavily forced.

[Taronyu]

-SNIP
B. na'vi don't have ellipses.

You have led my to think that all of the punctuation we have been using is highly debatable.  With grammar words like srak, pak or nang, it leads me to think that our use of punctuation of any kind is heavily forced.

Not my intention. Just making some light banter, haha.

[Alìm Tsamsiyu]

You have led my to think that all of the punctuation we have been using is highly debatable.  With grammar words like srak, pak or nang, it leads me to think that our use of punctuation of any kind is heavily forced.

I don't mean to derail this thread putting on a topic of punctuation, but I think it is way off-base to say we are using punctuation incorrectly.  The language is purely spoken, there IS no punctuation.  Putting punctuation in our writing of the language is ONLY to convey clarity and reading-flow to someone reading it.  If you wanted someone to say "I (long pause) don't know" you would write it as "I... don't know."  Just because Na'vi doesn't have punctuation doesn't mean they don't have "long pauses" in their speech, and just because there may be a case in which a long pause is inserted into a phrase, to convey that in writing the ellipses would be used.  Not because there's an actual ellipses character in Na'vi, but because anyone reading it will then understand that there is a long pause there.  Without punctuation like that, it's impossible for the writer to convey the correct reading of the sentence.

[Suteyä Hawnuyu]

That's a line from The Sound of Music!

[Eight]

I don't mean to derail this thread putting on a topic of punctuation

Derail away - this is just a thread I post random sentences in to ask for feedback. I'm more than happy if people want to talk about related issues.

On the punctuation side, I really don't know. At the minute I'm leaning towards using as little English punctuation as possible whilst still trying to make it clear what I'm attempting to say.

That's a line from The Sound of Music!

Hahaha. Very good! Double points if you can figure out what my second post was an attempt at. But beware, you risk exposing my age. Not that I'm old old, but probably a little older than many on here from what I've read.

[Taronyu]

Alìm Tsamsiyu, I was joking.

[Eight]

Hmm... 'bout time I learned to ask questions... so...

peut oeru ngal pereng, ma Wìlìs.
what-acc me-dat you-erg tell<ing>, Willis

Edit: forgot English.

[Taronyu]

peut oeru ngal pereng, ma Wìlìs.

I'd just say: peut ngal pereng, ma wìlìs?

But then again, maybe we need some different [key] strokes to say that correctly.

[Eight]

I'd just say: peut ngal pereng, ma wìlìs?

I thought putting oeru in made it catchier... but it doesn't. Yours is better.

But then again, maybe we need some different [key] strokes to say that correctly.

Oh my... hahahah. That deserves a bm bm tsh, and an applaud.

[Eight]

Guess the tune... (and comment on my language use if you'd be so kind )

slä oeyä sa'nok parmeng:
tìyawnìri, ngal nìwin rivikx ke tsun
kehe, nì'aw pivey nga zene

Spoiler

but I-GEN mother tell-IMPERFECT
love-TOPICAL, you-ERG fast-ADV move-SUBJ/INFIN not can
no, only wait-SUBJ/INFIN you must

but my mother said:
regarding love, you can't move quickly
no, you must only wait

OR

but mama said:
you can't hurry love,
no, you just have to wait

You Can't Hurry Love - The Supremes

[Eight]

oeru fpom ke lu.

oe ke tsun lerur¹ kivä ulte oe hahaw nì'aw.

¹Ler + ru seemed wierd.

[Taronyu]

Do you really need a correction thread, anymore?

Those sentences are good.

Ulte txo ngari fì'ut tsun tslivam a oe perlltxe, ha kivä ngayä lì'u atusäftxu alaksì Iknimayaru leiu.

[Eight]

Do you really need a correction thread, anymore?

Lol. I dunno... still so much to learn. Mainly I just try to keep my musings out of the way; wouldn't want to be annoying.

Ulte txo ngari fì'ut tsun tslivam a oe perlltxe, ha kivä ngayä lì'u atusäftxu alaksì Iknimayaru leiu.

Tewti. Oel fpìl futa ngayä ralit oel tslivam, slä san li'u atusäftxu sìk hiyìk lam. Oe nì'ul ftivia tsa'ut zene.

Irayo ma Taronyu.

(Edit: ok ok, I made a couple of small changes after initially posting. )

[Taronyu]

Ha, no worries. Keep them coming, if you want. Maybe go for full paragraphs of text? Or just go to the advanced forum?

lì'u atusäftxu
word ATTR-weave-PART
weaving-word

Maybe lì'u should be plural.

[Eight]

Maybe go for full paragraphs of text?

Trying to think of something cool to write. Nobody wants to read a full paragraph explaining why I'm feeling sick today... even in Na'vi.

Besides, once I get past "oeyä ontu terul.." I'm kinda stuck.

Edit: Forgot where I was for a second, before anyone (not you mate) hops in to point out that's an idiom/metaphor , I was just joking.

lì'u atusäftxu
word ATTR-weave-PART
weaving-word

That's pretty much what I figured, but wanted to check a little.