Author Topic: Worship Songs  (Read 8047 times)

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Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Worship Songs
« on: February 12, 2012, 03:42:16 pm »
I wasn't sure where to put this, either here or in the Fan Music or Pamrel or wherever.  This seemed most appropriate, but feel free to move it. :) Anyway, I was sort of hoping to translate a few of my favorite songs (only one of which I have "finished") or just start a thread to translate any/all worship songs.  Songs are especially difficult, I find.  So...here goes.


« Last Edit: February 13, 2012, 03:41:39 pm by Stranger Come Knocking »


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline Niri Te

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #1 on: February 12, 2012, 04:15:00 pm »
 It looks very easy to sing, and the timing looks good, even though I would need a dictionary to be able to understand each word.
 Do you play on a worship team at Church?
Niri Te
Tokx alu tawtute, Tirea Le Na'vi

Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #2 on: February 12, 2012, 04:27:55 pm »
It looks very easy to sing, and the timing looks good, even though I would need a dictionary to be able to understand each word.
Hahaha, don't we all? (Don't answer that.)

Do you play on a worship team at Church?
Niri Te
Goodness, no!  I have transcended the rank of soprano into a realm that frightens small children and the people around me and myself.

No, but I work on the computer (Do you know what ProPresenter is?).


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline `Eylan Ayfalulukanä

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #3 on: February 13, 2012, 03:07:28 pm »
My 'kitties' can go an octave or two below me....  ;)

Nice work on the translation! (This is a worship song I am not familiar. I haven't been a regular churchgoer for about 7 years, but I have recently started attending a new church that just opened in a space right over my head at work!) There are some things that need work, though. I don't have time to go over it line by line right now, but two things draw immediate attention. First of all, you seem to overuse the <iv> infix. This infix should be used for things you wish for, or want. You are using it places (like the first line) that there really isn't a wishful condition, but rather a statement of fact or condition. <iv> is also used for commands, but can be omitted if the command is clearly imperative. (The third common place is modal constructions, but I didn't see any of these.) You also used a perfective tense infix <ol> in a place where a simple future tense would have worked a bit better. Also, capitalize the pronouns that refer to Yawey. You may also consider using the honorific register for these pronouns, but you can omit these as well, to get the rhythm right.

The translation in the refrain seems a lot stronger, and I bet you started with it!

Yawey ngahu

Yawey ngahu!
pamrel si ro [email protected]

Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #4 on: February 13, 2012, 03:23:48 pm »
My 'kitties' can go an octave or two below me....  ;)
Yeah?  Post-soprano competition!

Nice work on the translation!
Yayz! *warm fuzzies* :D

(This is a worship song I am not familiar. I haven't been a regular churchgoer for about 7 years, but I have recently started attending a new church that just opened in a space right over my head at work!)


There are some things that need work, though. I don't have time to go over it line by line right now, but two things draw immediate attention. First of all, you seem to overuse the <iv> infix.
IV!  IVIVIVIVIVIVIVIVIVIVIVIVIVIVIV!

This infix should be used for things you wish for, or want. You are using it places (like the first line) that there really isn't a wishful condition, but rather a statement of fact or condition.
Specific line? ???

<iv> is also used for commands, but can be omitted if the command is clearly imperative.
Right, but I thought "iv" was polite or not quite so... NOW!

You also used a perfective tense infix <ol> in a place where a simple future tense would have worked a bit better.
Where?

Also, capitalize the pronouns that refer to Yawey. You may also consider using the honorific register for these pronouns, but you can omit these as well, to get the rhythm right.
Gotcha on the first part.  You lost me on the second.

The translation in the refrain seems a lot stronger, and I bet you started with it!
What's a refrain?
î I'm just the techie.

Yawey ngahu
Irayo. :D Yawey ngahu.


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline Alyara Arati

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #5 on: January 18, 2014, 09:09:20 pm »
I know that this thread is disused, but I thought this link belonged here. :)

http://forum.learnnavi.org/pamtseo-ninavi-niaw/oeri-fiatantsyip-this-little-light-of-mine/
Learn how to see.  Realize that everything connects to everything else.
~ Leonardo da Vinci

Offline `Eylan Ayfalulukanä

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #6 on: January 19, 2014, 03:29:00 am »
I have long-forgot we had a thread like this. Perhaps a good reason for me to translate a favorite worship some or two!

Yawey ngahu!
pamrel si ro [email protected]

Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #7 on: January 13, 2015, 11:56:36 am »
So I woke up this morning and decided I was going to translate another song into not just one, but a dozen languages.  This is what happened.  It is actually predominantly Quenya Elvish, however, for the chorus and bridge, I also included just a little High Valyrian, Na'vi, Astapori Valyrian, Dothraki, Swahili, Latin, Afrikaans, Italian, French, German, Anishinaabemowin, and Russian.  I would be curious to know what you all think.

*Sing-ability not included >_>

The ResultThe LiteralWhat I Worked Of Off
Nan
Ontar i meneliva, nan
I calima ar arinya elen, nan
Súlë carmëo
Ya ilumë nen
Ar túla

Nan
Eru ya vannë nénessë, nan
Eru ya sertanë ëar, nan
árë ar silmë
Tanen a cenë
Ar a hilyan
Ar istuvat

Iksan
Qelbar glaesarȳr iēdro
Sīmonta trēsy valo
Tepatys ābrar
Se skorī limāt, oe lu
Zongyu sì zongtseng
A yolur ngeyä tìvawmìt
Trr'ong sì txon'ong
Tì'i'avay krrä
Oe lu

Nan
Coacalina lyessë, nan
Lussë óretyassë, nan
Eru ya sintet
Nó nostatya
Paluva nó net

Hatif rhaeshesersi, vekhat
Ulimwengu, nimekuwa
In animo omno, ego
Waar jy is, ek is
Signore dei signori, Sono
Roi des rois, Je suis
Das heilig Lamm, Ich bin
Ishpayi'ii akina gegoo

Nyk skan
Oa sumby si oa kiba
Ji trezy eme vala
J'azanty eme v'adjo
Si esko ilima, я
твой спаситель
кто носил грехи человечества
Автор и создатель
Начало и конец
Я
I am
The creator of the heavens, I am
The bright and morning star, I am
The breath of creation
Who always was
And is coming

I am
The one who walked on water, I am
The one who made the sea rest, I am
Sunlight and starlight
Therefore see
And follow
And you will know

I am
The river of living water
The risen son of man
Giver of life
And when you cry, I am
Savior and refuge
Who washed away your darkness
Morning and evening
Forever
I am

I am
The light of the house within you, I am
The whisper in your heart, I am
The one who knew you
Before your birth
Even before you were

Before the world, I am
The universe, I am
In every heart, I am
Where you are, I am
Lord of lords, I am
King of kings, I am
The holy Lamb, I am
Over everything

I am
Your shield and your father
The son of man
The knight of the child
And when you cry, I am
Your savior
Who bore the sins of mankind
Author and creator
Beginning and the end
I am
I am
The maker of the Heavens, I am
The bright and morning star, I am
The breath of all Creation
Who always was
And is to come

I am
The One who walked on water, I am
The One who calmed the seas, I am
The miracles and wonders
So come and see
And follow me
You will know

I am
The fount of living water
The risen Son of man
The healer of the broken
And when you cry I am
Your savior and redeemer
Who bore the sins of man
The author and perfecter
Beginning and the end
I am

I am
The spirit deep inside you, I am
The word upon your heart, I am
The One who even knew you
Before your birth
Before you were

Before the Earth, I am
The universe, I am
In every heart, I am
Oh, where you are, I am
The Lord of lords, I am
The King of Kings, I am
The Holy lamb, I am
Above all things

I am
Almighty God your Father
The risen Son of man
The healer of the broken
And when you cry I am
Your savior and redeemer
Who bore the sins of man
The author and perfecter
Beginning and the end
I am

I will admit to attempting some word play, such as "zongyu sì zongtseng" to try to convey both a kind of action (someone saving you) as well as the noun or state of being (being in a safe place).  Also, using Russian last so I could have "Я" be the last word, as it is the last letter of the Russian alphabet (Beginning and End and such), added to the repeated use of morning and evening, sunlight and starlight, etc.

Edit: I found my complete English-Quenya dictionary. o.o Okay, we're just going to modify this a squidge.
« Last Edit: January 13, 2015, 12:04:17 pm by Stranger Come Knocking »


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline `Eylan Ayfalulukanä

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #8 on: January 16, 2015, 01:25:40 am »
Txantsan!

Another song I am not familiar with.

It would be interesting to see the Quenya translation alongside this.

I should translate a song I know. I started one, but I stopped for some reason. Let's see what the weekend holds for me. I never know one day to the next what is going to happen anymore :(

Yawey ngahu!
pamrel si ro [email protected]

Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #9 on: January 17, 2015, 04:29:41 pm »


Mark Schultz - I Am


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: Worship Songs
« Reply #10 on: January 24, 2015, 06:41:35 pm »
Had to do a little contracting for syllables' sake, but otherwise it sings and rhymes very well I'd say.  So how did I do? :)


Na'viLiteralOriginal
Oe lu alìm
Oeyä tirea lu ngeyn
Ayrrap za'u
Fpomìt 'anla txe'lan
Fäkä oe ts'krr
Oe pey mìsìfnu
V'krr za'u nga
Ulte heyn oehu

Ngal kxeltek oet
Fte oe tsun tsivyìl ayram
Ngal kxeltek oet
Fte oel terìran sìnpay't
Oe lu seykxel
Oe tok mì ngeyä etnaw
Ngal kxeltek oet
Fte oe 'ivong

Lu ke tìrey
Ke tìrey luke tsawä yewla
Oel 'efu 'ekongìt txe'lanä
Tsakrr za'u nga
Ngal 'aku tse'atswot
Ulte oe kame
Tsenga nga tok

Ngal kxeltek oet
Fte oe tsun tsivyìl ayram
Ngal kxeltek oet
Fte oel terìran sìnpay't
Oe lu seykxel
Oe tok mì ngeyä etnaw
Ngal kxeltek oet
Fte oe 'ivong
I am far away
My soul is tired
Storms come
The heart longs for peace
Then I ascend
I wait in the silence
Until you come
And sit with me

You raise me up
So I can climb mountains
You raise me up
So I am walking on water
I am strong
I am upon your shoulders
You raise me up
So I may bloom

There is no life
No life without it's disappointment
I feel the heartbeat
Then you come
You remove the sight
And then I see
Where you are

You raise me up
So I can climb mountains
You raise me up
So I am walking on water
I am strong
I am upon your shoulders
You raise me up
So I may bloom
When I am down
And, oh, my soul, so weary
When troubles come
And my heart burdened be
Then I am still
And wait here in the silence
Until You come
And sit a while with me

You raise me up
So I can stand on mountains
You raise me up
To walk on stormy seas
I am strong
When I am on Your shoulders
You raise me up
To more than I can be

There is no life
No life without its hunger
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly
But when You come
And I am filled with wonder
Sometimes I think
I glimpse eternity

You raise me up
So I can stand on mountains
You raise me up
To walk on stormy seas
I am strong
When I am on Your shoulders
You raise me up
To more than I can be
« Last Edit: January 24, 2015, 06:51:17 pm by Stranger Come Knocking »


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

 

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