Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}

[Eana Ketuwong]

 

[Lolet]

Great job on the beginning. I thought it was really sweet. 

[Eana Ketuwong]

Great job on the beginning. I thought it was really sweet. 

Irayo, ma 'eylan!

[Eana Ketuwong]

Added a small section to part one

[Eichhörnchen]

Kaltxì

Okay English is not my mother tongue, but what I have read and understand is sooo cute.
I hope this will be continued...

Irayo ma Eana Ketuwong, for this nice tale.


Eywa ngahu,

Eichhörnchen

[Eana Ketuwong]

Kaltxì

Okay English is not my mother tongue, but what I have read and understand is sooo cute.
I hope this will be continued...

Irayo ma Eana Ketuwong, for this nice tale.


Eywa ngahu,

Eichhörnchen

Irayo, ma 'tsmuk! It means a lot I will continue this fan fic. soon; I am currently in the writing process of Part One...
Again, irayo!

-Eana K.

[Amaya]

Just a gentle suggestion, you might want to pay a little more attention to the occasional tense-shifting.

For the most part, stories are written in past tense, but writing in present tense is acceptable too, as long as you stick to one

(not that there's a lot of it, and this is something that tends to improve with time, but it's something to watch)

[Eana Ketuwong]

Ah, yes thank you for pointing that out; I realize that myself and it's the one thing that I constantly worry about when I let others read what I've written.

I'm trying ti improe, and this is a good motivator.

Irayo,

Eana K.

[Amaya]

One thing that I've found helps for catching small errors is to read what I've written out loud.  You're using a different part of your brain, and it can twig onto stuff that your writing brain has blinders about since it knows what it meant to write.

[Eana Ketuwong]

One thing that I've found helps for catching small errors is to read what I've written out loud.  You're using a different part of your brain, and it can twig onto stuff that your writing brain has blinders about since it knows what it meant to write.

Thanks for the tip! It really worked, too; my friend read it aloud and I noticed a TON, but in just my opinion.

Irayo,
Eana K.

[Eichhörnchen]

Kaltxì ma Eana Ketuwong

Again a beautiful part of the story. I like the Idea with the young Neytiri, but I think It's a little Beast. ( bug her Sempul ). 
Can't wait to read more...

best regards,

Eichhörnchen

[Eana Ketuwong]

Kaltxì ma Eana Ketuwong

Again a beautiful part of the story. I like the Idea with the young Neytiri, but I think It's a little Beast. ( bug her Sempul ). 
Can't wait to read more...

best regards,

Eichhörnchen

Irayo! I have added a bit to part two...it's up now, but it is not finished.

Thanks again,
Eana Ketuwong

[Eana Ketuwong]

Added some to Part Two

[Eana Ketuwong]

Finished Part Two: Numeyu

[Eana Ketuwong]

Wow, it's been a WAY TOO LONG since I've added to the story. I'm truly quite sorry, but I've said before that there's been a lot going on in my life BUT I've worked on improving my writing skills, and I have a really good feeling on this chapter. Thank you if you've been waiting for me to add more; it's a sad thing that I haven't added anything but, again, too busy.

I've also been taking a break from Na'vi/Avatar (I FEEL TERRIBLE...) for personal reasons, but I've started to slowly get myself back into it, and things are starting to look up again.

Irayo,
Eana Ketuwong