Pasha, an Avatar story.

[Toliman]

That is good And good work again

[archaic]

Part 68

Spoiler: Time traveling.

"So, is there a time machine anywhere in the museum?"
"There will be, in the future."
Chris rolled his eyes.
"Helpful." Chris, with semi subtle sarcasm.
Dino consulted his pocket size viewscreen.
"Movies! Theres a whole area of the Sci-fi section dedicated to time travel, including a couple of old phoneboxes, for some reason. Weird."
"So, how long'll it it take to get to the time machine?" Chris, with a knowing smile.
"I'll just treat that with the contempt it deserves."
"N't n'd'ständ."
"Oh boy, I, err ..... I'll explain after we've done the time machine thing."
"It'll make sense then."
"Mmm. At least I hope it will."
Pasha still looked confused.
"Seriously, how far is it?"
"Sci-fi? There's definitely a trek."
"Get on with it."
"The puns?"
"No. The other thing."
"Kill joy."
"Joy's not the one in the cross hairs."
"Cross hairs?"
"Cross? They're bleedin' furious!"
"It's this way."
Dino lead, he'd been right, it was a surprisingly long walk, plus an elevator ride.
"Movies!"
"Oh yes, so it is, the big sign that says 'The Movies' totally doesn't give it away!" Chris, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
"A better response might 'ave been 'Where now?' "
"Alright then, 'Where now?' ..... Barring in mind we're here for the sci-fi, not horror and or fantasy."
"You saw that coming?"
"Yep. You know, I worry you've been spending way to much time around Mark."
"He's a bad influence."
"I can't argue with that."
"That's not like you."
"Meh."
"Right, Sci-fi, Time Travel."
It didn't take long to thread their way around the rest of the exhibition, to the right section.
"Time travel!"
"I know what I'm hoping to find."
"What's that?"
"Jules Verne's time machine. I dunno, was it the first? Anywho, it's got a spiny round thing, which is kinda cool."
"And here it is."
"Wow, that's a lot of cut glass. I bet it's plastic."
"And the informational plaque ..... 'Recreation of the prop used in the movie The Time Machine, released in two thousand and two.' Doesn't say what the clear bits are made of. Probly plastic though."
"Kehe, oe ke, ìì, ay n't n'd'ständ."
"OK, this is where it gets complicated. Well, hard to understand, anyway."
"Mind 'splody."
"Err, yeah. So, oh god, wish me luck ..... "
"Yeah, good luck."
"Thanks  ..... You remember the cars, and things?"
"Wilz."
"Yeah, the things with wheels, they go forwards, backwards, left and right?"
"Srane. Ìì, y's, iven."
"This doesn't."
"Ìì ..... "
"Don't worry, this is not going to get any easier any time soon."
"Thank you Dino, probly right though. This machine moves backwards and forwards though time."
Pasha raised an eyebrow a fraction, or would have, if she had them. There was still a visible movement, even so.
"You remember yesterday?"
"Sr ..... Yes."
"The past is the past, we can't go to the past."
"Thìs ay n'w."
"But with this machine, you could."
"If it was real. Which it's not."
Pasha looked confused for several moments.
"N't ril?"
"No, we haven't actually invented time travel."
"Yet."
Pasha looked at them, she was trying to take this on board.
"Have we arrived at the absolute limit of possible understanding. I mean, well, you know."
"Has it occurred to you, that we might have arrived at, and maybe even exceeded, the absolute possible limit of our ability to explain stuff?"
"Fair point."
"We've grown up with the concept, watched movies and shows, and played games with time travel in. It ain't new to us. We've kinda absorbed it intuitively."
"Movie! Show her the movie!"
"OK, but I gotta go pee first!"
"Alright, might as well go back to security and bung the kettle on, then."
"Sounds good, don't let me stand in your way!"
The Time travel section was a loop. They stopped at another exhibit.
"So, there's a car in here 'n' all."
"Typical, what's this old thing been in?"
" 'Back to the Future'."
"I don't think so!"
Chris and Dino both bent down to read the info.
"I never knew Back to the Future was first made in the nineteen eighties!"
"Me either!"
"It's true what they say."
"Every day's a school day?"
"It sure is, it sure is!"

Last piece this year.
EDIT:- spelling

[Toliman]

Good work And good luck with your writing in new year

[archaic]

Thanks, I think I'm going to need it!

[Toliman]

Kea tìkin:)

[archaic]

Part 70

Spoiler: Addiction.

"Tea?"
"Err, no, no thanks, I've had an epiphany, and I've become alcohol total."
"So, that's like tea total, but the other way round?"
Chris nodded.
"I see, and you reckon I've been spending too much time with Mark. Still, I'll chuck it down the sink for you, as you don't want it."
"I may be having a relapse."
"No, no, what kind of friend would I be, if I allowed, let alone encouraged, you to fall back in to you bad habits? No, down the sink it goes."
"I was wrong! I'm not ready to go cold turkey! I need tea!"
"Sorry Pasha, but there's no helping thing this hopeless addict."
"Ìì, ay n't n'd'ständ."
"Nah, well, we haven't got into addictions."
"I should hope not!"
"You know what I mean."
"Mmm. I think I know the next one to have a crack at."
"Yeah?"
"Mmm-yeah, paradoxes."
"By definition, something that heads can't be got round. At least, not properly."
"If/when she's grasped time travel ..... I mean, it is the ultimate consequence of time travel, after all."
"I guess."
"One cup of tea. With fake milk, and real sweetener." Dino, handing Chris his tea.
"Is the cup real?"
"Nope, it's figment of your imagination."
"I see. So, why would I imagine there's a chip out of it?"
"Hmm, that's too deep for me ..... Better take it up with your psychiatrist."
"I'll add it to the list."
"Speaking of psychiatric patients, did you talk to Mark yet?"
"Shift swap, fifth to the eighth."
"Mmm."
"Mmm."
"And his answer was?"
"As unhelpful as you'd expect. But he did say 'yes'."
"Err ..... , ..... OK."
"Cheers for the tea, another good 'un."
"Yeah, we really need to find a way to stop them repairing the machine."
"That's a big fat deffo on that!"
"So, Pasha, how you getting on with time travel."
"Ìt n't ril."
"Yeah, and?"
"Go f'rw'dz änd päkwdz ìn tim." Pasha sounded doubtful.
"No, that's right. And?"
"Ìì ...... "
"Hang on, were'nt we going to watch 'The Time Machine; when we came back here?"
"Oh yeah, hang on, 2002 version? With the time machine we saw in the exhibit."
"Yeah, why not."
"Just a moment ..... Here we go."
Chris made a wipe gesture with his hand across his viewscreen and then over the monitor wall. They watched for a while.
"W't they?"
Pasha pointed to a small collection of pocket watched on screen, the had all started to run backwards. Chris hit pause.
"Ah, now they need a bit of explaining."
"Yeah, fortunately for you, there's a couple in one of the glass cases up in the gift shop."
"Come on then."
They de-camped.

"So, here on Earth, we measure a day out in twenty four hours."
"And each hour is divided into sixty minutes, and each minute is divided into sixty seconds, and each second is divided into one hundred hundredths of a second. Or a thousand milliseconds, depending on just how anal you want your timing to be."
"Yes, thank you Dino."
"And then there's nano seconds, loads an' loads of them in a whole second, that's for sure!"
Chris gave Dino a look.
"You know, there are times when I wonder if my contributions truly appreciated."
"Well allow me to set your mind at rest. They ain't. Not even slightly."
"Well, that's the last cup of tea I'm making for you!"
"Apart from the tea, the tea's always very much appreciated." Chris said, quickly and emphatically "Always. Very much. Very, very much. Appreciated, that is. Obviously. I think." he added, getting progressively less quick and even less emphatic.
They walked for a while in near silence.
"And here we are, one glass case, and one selection of assorted watches and clocks. Some digital, some analogue."
"Thanks, you know, ever since I lost my sight, it's been so useful to have you around, to provide these helpful little running comments."
"Sarcasm is it now?"
" 'Now' is a relative term, when your dealing with time travel."
"Which ..... Oh yeah, we were, weren't we."
"Yeah, do try an' keep up!"

[Toliman]

Good work

[archaic]

It's late, and I'm not getting anywhere with this tonight, hopefully tomorrow I'll have something to post.

[Toliman]

Okay, hayalovay ma archaic

[archaic]

My apologies for the delay.

Part 71

Spoiler: Loony whack job.

"OK, so, here are watches, the big hand ..... "
"Which is the short one."
" ..... Yes, the big hand is the short one ..... "
"Ay n't n'd'ständ."
"And we've barely begun."
"Thank you Dino. OK, the 'Big Hand' used to be much wider than the little hand ..... "
"Which is the longer thick one."
"Yeah, but people think that making them the same thickness looks cool, so most watches have them the same with."
"But not all."
"No, not all."
"Ìì, ay n't n'd'ständ. Wt händ min?"
"Oh,OK, so, if you look at that chunky one, in the middle there. You see there's a thing that's moving round?"
"Sr ..... Yes." Pasha, correcting herself.
"That bit that's moving, that's a 'hand'."
"N't luk layk händ." Here, Pasha held up her hand.
"She's got ya' there."
"I agree, it looks nothing like an actual hand, but, that's just what they're called."
"Händ." Pasha considered this for a moment.
"Exactly, so the fast one that's the longest, but is real skinny, that's the second hand."
"Ther ar thri?"
"Yeah, they started with just an hour hand, that just said what the hour was, but they got better at making clocks, and clocks got more complicated, and they figured out how to have a minute hand. Then, later still, they manager to make clocks even more better ..... "
" 'More better.' "
" ..... Yeah, anywho, they then added another hand, so you could measure time even more accurately."
"Yeah, our shift begins at eight PM, which is twenty hundred, but that's another thing all together."
"It is, yeah, so let's leave it for another time."
"Boom, boom."
"Sorry, no pun intended.  Eight O'clock. The big hand points to the eight."
"And it's in Roman numerals."
"Yeah, Roman numerals, Jesus, this gets ..... So, there used to be these people called the Romans, and they conquered lots of places, and they used, well, they wrote numbers differently ..... "
"And how."
" .....Yeah."
"And they spoke Latin."
"Let's just stick to Roman numerals for the time being."
"Pun intended?"
"Err ..... What? No. No pun intended. Hang on ..... "
Chris looked up Roman numerals on his viewscreen.
"Here we go. See, one i is one, two i's is two, three i's is three, then four can be either four i's or iv, because v is five, and four is one before five."
"Ìì ..... "
"Yeah, that's exactly how I felt when I encountered them for the first time. Now, six is vi, one after five, seven is vii, eight is viii, and nine can be either ix, or viiii, but you almost never see that, it's almost always ix."
"Ay 'ks?"
"Yeah, x is ten, nine is one before ten, so ix."
Pasha looked bemused.
"Stay with it, 'coz we're nearly there, at least there enough for watches and clocks."
"He's right, eleven xi, one atfer ten, and twelve is xii, two after ten. And clocks only go up to twelve."
"Well, the hours do."
"Oh god, there's minutes and seconds to do too, Christ, this is a ..... "
"Pain in the neck?"
"Yeah, a pain in the neck, in the neck, defiantly. Neck. Defiantly neck."
"Nk?"
"Yeah, neck, this bit." Dino, gesturing to his neck."
"Lu pewn nìNa'vi."
"Huh?" Dino, confused.
"Pewn." but Chris managed it.
"Pewun?"
"Pewn, the word for neck in Na'vi, her language."
"Oh, so this is a give and take language class?"
"Always, although she's a bit better at it than I am."
"Pìt?"
"Alright, a lot better."
"Srane."
"Srane means yes. And 'Sran' means yeah. At least, I think I understood that correctly."
"Yu dìd."
"OK, so, when a second hand goes all the way round, the minute hand moves forward one minute, you see the little marks between the numbers?"
"Ye?"
"Nice one, you're getting the hang of this. So, each one of those is one minute, and because there are sixty of them, there are five between each of the numbers."
"And five times twelve is sixty, so, err, what was I saying?"
"Five times twelve is sixty, which it is. Anyways, err, yeah, so, err, mmm."
`Ìì."
"Yeah, so there are twenty four hours in a day, and the big hand, which is the shortest, shows to hours. The little hand, which is fairly thick, and may or may not be as thick as the big hand, that shows the minutes. And the long very thin one shows the seconds."
"Ìì ..... txwe'txi f'w."
"Yeah?"
"B'tx th'r twlv nmbrz."
"Err, yeah, the hour hand goes round twice in a day, once from midnight to mid day, once from mid day back to midnight."
"Ay n't n'd'ständ."
"Right, a day starts at midnight."
"Dey nt strt ät sn riz?"
"Ah, that's when day starts, as opposed to night but the day as in today, or tomorrow, that starts at midnight. 'Coz it's a fixed thing, where as dawn, or sun rise happens at different times of day according to the seasons."
Pasha looked confused.
"OK this is winter, it is cold, sunrise happens later, and sun set is earlier, night lasts a lot longer during winter."
"But in Summer, sunrise is earlier, and sunset is later, so night is much shorter than day. It's also not as cold. Partly because we get more sun, which warms everything up more."
"Yeah, that."
Pasha still looked confused.
"Nid rst."
"Let's go back to security."
"Cuppa?"
"Obvs."
"Carry on watching the movie?"
"Sounds like a plan."

"So, to recap, a car, or basically anything with wheels, goes forwards, backwards, left and right in space. A time machine goes backwards and forwards in time."
"So you can go visit yesterday, Christmas day, Christmas day last year. Show up for the birth of Christ."
"If he ever really existed."
"Yeah. Hey, it'd really mess things up if you went back and discovered he didn't."
"What, if it was all just faked?"
"Or he was really just some loony whack job, and everyone told lies so they didn't look like total idiots for following him round and stuff."
"Or edited highlights of several real people stuck together ..... "
"With no doubt some 'embellishments'. "
" ..... yeah that, and again a load of lies to cover tracks."
"Yeah, cos whatever else, what is known for a fact is, the early Popes did a lot of editing out of anything they didn't like. What was it, the hatchet job of Nicaea? Or summut like that anyways."
The kettle boiled, and switched itself off.
"Tea?"
"Mmm!"
"Or you could go forward, drop in on us tomorrow, or next week, skip ahead to next Christmas, or go a thousand years. Or whatever you like."
"Which is where all this started, skip ahead, find out the lottery numbers, and come back, buy the winning ticket and WIN!"
"And then retire and never have to go to work again!"
"Yeah! Exactly!"
"And never come here again!"
"Precisely!"
"And never get to chat with Pasha ever again!"
"Yeah! Oh. Not so good."
"Here you go."
Chris placed a cup of tea in front of Dino."
"Cheers." Dino took a sip "Oh yes."
"See, time travel, opens up a whole fresh can of worms."
"Still, better a fresh can of worms, than a can of mouldy old worms."
"Maybe. Yeah OK, fresh worms, probly better than mouldy old worms."
"But if you had a time machine, you could go back to before the worms went mouldy."
"Isn't that a paradox?"
"Most probly."
"So, what have we learned?"
"Thät yu tu creyzi ar. Ìì, 'yu tu ar creyzi', iveng. 'Iven', iven."
"So, are we gonna watch the rest of that movie, or what?"
Pasha shifted uneasily, she didn't look like she was up for that.
"How about Back to the Future?"
"Which one?"
"Well, I grew up with the 2100 version, didn't know there was an older one."
"You don't wanna watch the original?"
"Nah, I know the 2100 version, I know Pasha'll like it."
"2100 it is then!"
"At least, I think you'll like it. I sure enjoyed it back in the day. I hope you enjoy it." Chris, turning to Pasha.
Dino did the wipe and smear trick to put the movie on the monitor wall.

[Toliman]

No need to apologize and it's again good work

[archaic]

Part 72

Spoiler: Entertainment.

"OK, so, there you have it, time travel, a pardox, and a robot dog sidekick named Einstein."
"And 'over boards, don't forget 'over boards."
"Yeah, them 'n' all."
"Ìì ..... "
Pasha looked dumbfounded.
" ..... Ay ..... nt ..... shur ..... ay ..... nd ..... ständ."
"OK, so Mart has a friend name of 'Doc', an' 'e invents a time machine, gets killed by terrorists who he nicked the plutonium off of. Marty tries to get away, and accidentally travels back in time, where he meets his mom, and accidentally stops her from falling in love with his dad, so he'll stop having ever existed unless he can get them back together, which he does, with the Doc's help, because he was alive in the past because he hasn't been killed yet."
"It's his younger self."
"Yeah, then they use the bolt of lightening on the clock tower ..... "
"Which we found out about at the beginning of the Movie, and Lorraine wrote her social network ID on the flyer."
"Then Marty gets back to the present and finds out his family is totally different, and now owns the SUV he spotted and said he really really wanted back at the beginning."
"Yu sed tim trävl nt ril."
"That's right, it's not real."
"Bt ay sw?"
"OK, that wasn't a documentary, it was retro sci-fi."
"I believe the call it 'Transistor Punk'."
"Err, yeah, that rings a bell, actually. Now you say it."
"Nt ril?"
"No, not real."
Pasha didn't look any less confused.
"OK ..... " Chris sighed deeply "So, it was 'Entertainment'."
Pasha's expression remained unchanged.
"Entertainment ..... err."
"What does a dictionary say?"
"Good point."
Chris looked up the word entertainment.
"Here we go, Entertainment, noun, an activity, display, or presentation, giving pleasure, amusement, or diversion. Especially a performance of some form."
Pasha didn't look any more enlightened.
"You don't have movies. What do you do when you are not out hunting and gathering?"
"Ìì ..... ther lts thingz tu du in Kelutral."
"Such as?
"Ìì ..... Meyk ..... Ìì ..... txep?"
"Tep?"
"Srane, txep, lu txep, Ìì ..... yu pt, Ìì, rìn, ayvul, ayvultsyìp ..... Txep syuve 'em." Pasha looked defeated. "Ay nt häv wrdz."
"This is going to be tuff."
"Km ay shw."
Pasha lead, Chris and Dino followed, They arrived at Human Evolution exhibit, specifically the hunter gatherer family diorama, at the centre of the Paleolithic section.
"Txep lu" Pasha pointed to the fire.
"Fire?"
"Fayr?"
"Fire, you put fuel on, wood, logs, sticks."
"Lu rìn." Pasha, gesturing to the logs and sticks that appeared to be the fire wood.
Pasha stood up as straight as she could manage. She slipped her hands out of the crutches, and stuck her arms out wide, she froze in that pose for a moment."
"Oe lu utral."
"Ah, 'utral', that means tree."
"Srane, yes tri, utral tri is."
Pasha used her left hand to gesture to her whole right arm.
"Lu vul."
"Arm?"
"Branch!"
"Oh yeah, that makes sense."
"Vultsyìp." Pasha held up her right hand and pointed to her thumb "Ayvultsyìp!" Pasha now gesturing to all the digits on her right hand.
"Syipp, means little, so, vultsyìp is little branch, or stick, twig maybe?"
"Tangek." Pasha now gestured to her body and her one and a half legs.
"Trunk." Chris and Dino said in almost perfect unison.
Pasha squatted down uncomfortably.
"Ngrr." she said, making gestures of something extending down toward the floor.
"Roots."
"Nah, root singular, roots plural would be ayngrr. I think."
"OK, so I learned my first words of an alien language tonight. That's quite a thought actually."
"Something to tell the grand kids."
"Maybe. Err, why are we learning words for tree parts again?"
"Fire, fire wood, et cetera. I asked what they do when they're not hunting and gathering."
"Sleeping?"
"Not exactly 'entertainment' though."
"Oh yeah, entertainment. I'm guessing that tending the fire isn't the only thing they've got to do when they ain't 'untin' 'n' gatherin'."
"Probly not."
"And it's taken this long to get one of them, so, I s'pose, call it, what, about a month maybe to do all the common activities?"
"That's oddly specific?"
"Yeah, well, I've seen the drawing of her home, and there's a lot of little thingy bits drawn in there. So, I reckon there's probly quite lot more to being an 'unter gatherer' than just 'untin' 'n' gatherin'."

[Toliman]

Again good reading

[archaic]

Part 73

Spoiler: Pantyhose.

"Another scorcher today!"
"Mornin' Mark, nice pantyhose, really brings out your nasal hair."
"Mornin' Dino."
"Chris 'as got the kettle on. In fact, it's probably tea by now."
"Nice."
"You can strain it through your hosiery."
Mark went inside, leaving Dino to wonder why he was wearing pantyhose over his head.

"Morning Chris."
"Is that a ladder in your tights? Or are you just pleased to see me?" Chris, handing Mark a cup tea.
"Cheers."
"So ..... ?"
" 'So'? "
"Any particular reason behind this morning's head gear?"
"Oh, yeah, actually."
"And?"
"Hmm? Oh, yeah, right, yeah. So, err, yeah."
"Short and to the point, like it."
"I knew you would."
"OK then."
"Hand over."
"Yeah, absolutely nothing what so ever at all changed, not one little teeny tiny bit. Literally nothing, not the least little bit. Apart from today's date. And the pantyhose. Fashion statement?"
"Nope, purely practical."
"I should have guessed."
"Morning!"
"Morning Kyle."
"Morning Kyle."
"Well, that's me done, see you tomorrow!"
"Bye now!"
"Fair well, and may the wind always be on your back."
"Urm, yeah, cheers Mark."
"It don't blow muck in your face, if it's on your back."
"Unless you turn round."
"Hence 'Always' on your back."
"Ah yes. Right. I'm out of here."
"Missing you already!"
"He is, I'm just kinda 'meh' to be honest."
"Nice!"
Mark and Kyle watched Chris leave, he met up with Dino outside the side door. They didn't loiter, just walked quickly towards the station.
"Another shift closer to summer holidays."
"Mmm, Could do with a bit of summer, I'm sick to bleedin' death of being ruddy cold all the way home."
"Can't argue with that."
"Are we out of range of the security cameras yet?"
"Now I'm worried."
"Did you notice anything, oh I don't know, in any way unusual about Mark this morning?"
"When you say 'unusual about Mark'? "
"Anything seem in any way out of the ordinary?"
"Out of the ordinary generally, or out of the ordinary for Mark."
"Either?"
"Well, nothing that I'd of said was out of the ordinary for Mark, but now you come to mention it."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Tights?"
"Oh, that."
"You didn't think that was you know, 'out of the ordinary'? "
"For Mark?"
"Fair point."
They walked on in silence briefly.
"You don't think he's just come from a bank job, do you?"
"Knowing Mark?"
"Anything's possible?"
"Precisely."
"You know, I actually asked him about 'em."
"And?"
"He didn't give me a straight answer."
"Did he give you bi-curious answer instead then?"
"You've definitely been hangin' around with that Mark way too much!"

[Toliman]

Txantsan! Good work

[archaic]

And here we are again, RL has placed a spanner in the works tonight. I'm disappointed.

 

[Toliman]

That is understandable. Yeah, RL... it's sometimes hard.

[archaic]

Part 74

Spoiler: Bad tea and a gray/beige smear.

"Morning Geof, morning Jean."
"Morning Candice."
"Yeah, morning. Candice. Good week end?"
"Quiet. Relaxing, a nice chilled weekend. I was bored out of my mind by Saturday lunchtime. How were yours'."
"Well, saturday was in here, moving forward, nothing Earth shattering, but there's a full report in you're inbox."
"And Sunday was the usual, morning ritual, wander round, then afternoon ritual."
"Then home for a feet up."
"Yeah, traipsed right across Mesopotamia, felt like it too."
"Mmm! D'you think they put an extra tiring floor down in Mesopotamia?"
"Did feel like it."
"Anything stand out in particular?"
"Apart from the floor?"
"Well, yeah."
Jean and Geof looked at each other.
"Err."
"Stand out?"
"Too much, way too much."
"Mmm, I cant say any individual thing blew my mind substantially more than the general background awesomeness."
"Yeah, I think I'd go along with that."
"So a two millennia old homogenized gray/beige smear, of unbelievably epic West Asian awesomeness?"
"Mmm."
"Yep."
"Worth a looksie then."
"Deffo!"
"What isn't round here?"
"The drinks vending machine."
"Oh yeah."
"I don't mind the way it looks, so much as the beverages it discharges."
"For me, it's not so much as the beverage's aesthetics, brown opaque liquid. Pretty much hits the spot in that respect."
"It's the taste that really lets it down."
"The retina say "tea", the taste buds say 'Seriously?' "
"If you hold it up to your ear, it doesn't sound particularly wide of the mark."
"No, acoustically, it's pretty much on the money."
"Mmm."
"Why would you hold it to your ear?"
"Preferable to putting it to your lips, with associated elevation of swallowing risk."
"Mnyeah true, but, then there's an elevated risk of third degree burns to the ear drum."
"Still probably preferable to actually drinking it."
"Morning troops!"
"Morning Warren!" Candice, gleefully.
"Yeah, morning Warren." Jean, disappointedly.
" 'Grunt' " Geof, even more disappointedly.
"I believe it's traditional under such circumstances, to actually grunt, as opposed to saying the word 'Grunt' per se."
"I'll bare that in mind."
"So what are the malcontents winging unreasonably about this morning?"
"The tea, out the vending machine."
"That is bloody awful, isn't it?" Warren admitted.
"That is deeply, nay, profoundly insightful of you Warren." Candice, with a surprisingly convincing tone of sincerity.
"Piss taking git." Warren, more or less under his breath.
"Ready for another mental sparing match Warren?"
"I have office work to do."
"Cat videos it is, then."
Warren took a breath, opened his mouth, prepared to speak, and decided against it.
"Whatever." He said instead, a little bitterly.

The morning passed, laboratory staff mostly working alone on individual tests, and only conferring occasionally.
Pasha leaned against the back wall of her vivarium. She shuffled her feet right back to the wall, and drew herself up to her proper full height. Her head rested against the ceiling, she poked it exploratorily with a finger. It was metal, cold, hard and unyielding, all of it was unyielding, all or it was hard, and only the observation window didn't feel uncomfortably cold to the touch. Still, she'd found that if you stayed in one spot without moving, that piece of metal would warm up. It didn't make her feel any less homesick.
Lunchtime came and went.
It was around three pm, when there was a knock at the open door.
"Stan! Lovely to see you! To what do we owe the pleasure?"
"I come baring gifts, well, gift singular, anyhow."
"A large cardboard box! How did you know?" Candice, tongue in cheek.
The lab staff all gathered round, Warren heard, arrived at his office door, before joining the group.
"There you go." Stan, handing a box cutter to Candice.
She cut the security seal, before unpeeling the resealable closure, and opening the flaps wide.
"A thingy-bob! You shouldn't have."
"OK, what's that you got there then?"
"Err, looks like a very small airlock."
"Yep, one small airlock, ideal for passing stuff in and out the vivarium, more convenient than the main airlock. At least for smaller items, like food, and, err, stuff. I was hoping I might be around to fit it in person, but my flight's been moved up, so sadly, this is just a flying visit. No pun intended."
"I'll get maintenance to have a look at it."
"Right, well, as I said, flight to catch, hopefully next time I come to visit it'll be a bit more relaxed. Oh, hows the Balcony?"
"Err, large, and blooming cold, it was covered in frost when I got in this morning. I expect it'll be wonderful when the weather warms up a little."
"Can we have a barbecue in the summer?" Jean, holding up crossed fingers.
"Anything involving flames needs to be run past the building manager, but in theory I don't see why not." Warren, benevolently.
"And neither do I. Given that I'll most like be funding it." Candice, mostly to Warren.
"Speaking of funding ..... " Warren, pointedly looking at Stan's gift.
"As I said, gift. I've been repurposing an old hangar in New Mexico, this was being stored there, instructions were to toss it, but I thought I knew someone who'd appreciate it."
"And the shipping?" Warren, still expecting some kind of cost somewhere.
"Hand luggage." Stan, warmly.
"Oh." Warren seemed genuinely surprised.
An alarm on Stan's viewscreen sounded, he canceled it.
"Right, got to go, good luck, and see you in the summer for the barbecue, if not before!"

[Toliman]

Good work

[archaic]

Two late in a row, must try harder!

Part 75

Spoiler: A disappointing haul.

"Good evening, New British Museum, this is security, Paul Ellings speaking, how may I help you?"
"Evenin' Paul, nice and dry tonight, but cold as hell! Again."
"Pass phraze?"
"Severe acute contagious hypothermia."
The buzzer buzzed, and the door opened.
It was a few moments before Dino arrived in Security.
"No Chris yet?"
"I let him in while you were in the locker room."
"Hand over?"
"Same poo, different day."
"Nothing at all, in any way, however insignificant to mention, just to liven thing up even the least little teeniest tiniest little bit?"
"Nope!"
"What nothing?"
"Well there was one thing."
"Oh?"
"Yeah, apparently the guy may be coming to fix the vending machine. Either some time next week, or the week after."
"That's not good."
"No, it ain't. But watchya gonna do?"
"Cry into my overpriced, supposedly nature identical-ish, god-knows-what substitute?"
"We could just go on using the tea bags."
"Nah, there's a specific not about that in the site rules."
"Yeah, I read them, I think I may have found a loophole."
"Really?"
"Yeah, you can't boil the water in a kettle, plumbed in water heater, on cooker top, or stand alone ring or hob, or in the microwave."
"So?"
"They didn't say we couldn't boil it in a sauce pan, heated on a stand alone electric frying pan."
"Yea, well I've known this day was coming, so I've got a thermos in my locker! Come tea room opening time, I'm gonna buy one of their oh so generous, and not so well thought out, bottomless tea cups, and fill my flask. I'll be sitting pretty all the way home! Those execs and them science pukes didn't think of that, did they!?"
"Who's the budding genius then."
"I think I speak for us all, when I say, 'Me!' "
"And so modest with it, 'n' all."
"Thank you, thank you, I'd like to thank my parents, without whom it would not have been possible for me to be here today ..... "
"Yeah, don't milk it."
"Evening ladies!"
"Chris."
"Chris."
"What he said."
"Same poo, different day?"
"Oddly enough."
"Well, I'm out of 'ere."
"Me 'n' all."
"Before you go, any idea why Mark was wearing a pair of tights on his head this morning?"
"Clueless, din't know he was. Still, if it's Mark, so ..... Kinda, whatd'ya expect?"
"I know."
"Go on, fill us in."
"He wanted his hat, to keep warm, but he couldn't find it. His misses said she puts on a pair of tights if it's cold, and offers to lend Mark a pair."
"So he accepted, and put them on his head, blah, blah, blah, and the rest is self explanatory?"
"Precisely."
"The worrying thing is that you can think like Mark."
"That is a worry. Hmm."
"I'm out of here before Marks thinking processes come to get me too!"
"Later."
"Yeah, later."
"Mmm, later."
"Missin' you already!"
"You're a filthy liar."
"And you know it!"
Paul and Francis left, they hadn't gone far before the inevitable .....
"Tea?"
"Mmm, please, but there's a fly in the ointment on the horizon there."
"Oh?"
"Mmm, worrying news of the worst kind."
"Don't tell me they've fixed the vending machine." Chris looked and sounded awful.
"Not yet, but it's planned for some time in the next week or two."
"So, best enjoy it while we can."
"Mmm."
"Mmm."
"Depressing."
"Mmm."
"Well, it's not going to make itself."
"No, that's one thing in the vending machines favour. It's low effort."
"Apart from the fact you have to go to the machine. Kinda kills it for me. In terms of effort."
"True."
Chris judged two cups worth of water in the kettle, and flicked the switch.
"More time travel tonight?"
"I guess we could revisit it."
"It'll be just like last night, all over again."
"Déjà vu."
"How did I know you were going to say that?"
"Probly the time travel.
"Probly."
"Probly."
"I'm gonna check the lost property log, see if we've had anything interesting handed in."
"Remember the days when that was all you had to look forward to on a night shift?"
"Apart from going home."
"Apart from going home."
"Mmm, nothing good, couple of coats, handbag - claimed, brolley times two, viewcreen - claimed, another coat. Oh, and a shoe." Dino sounded disappointed.
"Just the one?"
"Uh'huh."
"Mmm ..... Disappointing haul. Good job there's something else, eh?"
"Wt thät?"
"So, it's not common knowledge, but we get visited by an alien ever night."
"It brightens the place up."
"Eyli'n?"
"Yeah, about so high, blue, has stripes, and a tail."
"Mi!"
"Yeah!"
"But Ay nt eyli'n, yu eyli'n."
"We are to her." Dino admitted."
"S'true, I hadn't thought of that, but, mmm."
"So, time travel?"
Pasha laughed.
"Sran, layk lst nayt."

Edit:- spelling.