Pasha, an Avatar story.

[archaic]

Part 22

Spoiler: Arrow

"Took your time Chris!"
"Pasha was talking me through the glass cases. In the Pandora exhibit."
"Oh right?"
"Yeah, an arrow is a swizz-whiz-ahw'."
"Swizaw."
"Swizz, err, yeah. So, what you two got planned for tonight? More poker?"
"No, I think she's pretty much got the hang of that."
"At least till next thursday."
"That's up to the other shift."
"Hmm? Oh yeah."
"That's a point, we're only here half the time, Pasha's alway's here."
"Yeah, so?"
"How do I explain that to her?"
"Do you need to?"
"Err, you know, I think I do?"
"You better do an exchange, coz there ain't no way either of you are going to have enough of the other's language to have that conversation. Not in three days. Nights, even."
"I think you're right."
"If your planning on being a fixture in her life, you're gonna have a lot of exchanges and over time to work."
"Just short term, I think she needs something solid in her life."
"What about the lab staff?"
"Coldest of cold hearted bunch of clinical I-dunno-what's, I ever met!"
"Yeah?"
"Clicky."
"Yeah, well they were a tight-knit, but insular team before they moved here. They're pretty far out of their comfort zone."
"You talked to them?"
"Yeah, had a long old chat with one of them last week."
"Oh, anything juicy?"
"Nah, but their manager's a waste of space, apparently."
"Aren't they all?"
Francis considered this for several moments.
"There must be one out there somewhere, who isn't."
"They're like Nessy and mermaids and dragons, Bigfoot ..... and honest politicians. Deep down, you know they're a myth, but you always hope."
"You know, it's precisely that trusting, carefree, happy go lucky attitude to life, that makes you such a joy to work with." Francis said with a sizeable portion of sarcasm.
"I know. It's a gift." Chris, tongue firmly in cheek.
"I'd ask for a refund, if I was you."
"So, how's that tea coming along?"
"Machine's out of order."
"What, did it insult your mother again?"
"It's busted."
"Oh. Well, it lasted over a week."
"Nine days."
"As long as that! Who had nine days?"
"Guess"
"Not Dino again!"
"Yep!"
"That's three times in a row he's won the damn sweepstake."
"Think it's him who's breaking it?"
"It'd explain a few things if it was."
"Mmm."
"Bring a kettle?"
"Nope."
"Microwave tea it is, then"
"No milk."
"I can drink black tea."
"No sweetener."
"Well, I guess I can adjust."
"And no tea."
"That's it, pass me the razor blade!"
"I called out for some."
"Razor blades?"
"Tea."
"Great!"
"Here in the morning."
"Typical."
"We could raid the tea room."
"There's an idea."
"We'd have to pay for it, mind."
"I didn't say it was a good idea."
"I'll get this round, you get next?"
"Yeah, what the hell."
Francis trudged off to the tea room.
Pasha was arranging cards on edge, leaning them against one another.
Criss took a few off the deck, and began to build a house of cards.
"Kehe, tsaw rikx." Pasha said, and wobbled the table.
"Coasters."
Chris went to the door, and called out to Francis.
"Table's wobbling again! Bring some coasters, when you come back!"
"OK!" Francis called back"
Chris returned to the table, Pasha had tidied up the cards.
She dealt one card from the pack
"Wun."
"Yes, that's right, one."
"Wun is 'aw'."
"Ah-'w'"
"Srane."
"Tu is 'mune'."
"Myun-eh."
"Klews in'f."

It was late in the shift, a buzzer sounded. Francis stood up, walked to the wall unit and pressed a button.
"Rome service."
"Can you send up another three magnums of champagne and some flowers, to room eight oh two."
"Plain, self raising, hard, unbleached, brown, wholemeal, oatmeal, buckwheat, cassava, rice, chickpea, maize, millet, coconut, hemp, mesquite, pea, soybean, taro, quinoa ..... ?"
"Just lemme in, it's raining out here."
"I can't let you in without the passphrase."
"It's beedin' cats and dogs out here!"
"Close enough."
Francis hit another button on the wall unit, there was a buzz.
"Thank you!"
It was maybe five or six minutes before the person arrived in security. When he did, he was drying his hair with a towel.
"I'd hang around after shift for a bit, if I were you. It's biblical out there! Almost run over by some bloke in a boat, said his name was Noah, or something?"
"You're early."
"Yeah, caught the forecast, thought I'd beet the rain. Forecast was wrong."
"Nice."
"So how's our resident's english lessons going?"
"There's progress, and we've been learning some alien language too."
"Yeah?
"Srane. Which means 'yes'."
"As opposed to 'sran', which means 'yeah'." Francis added helpfully.

[Toliman]

Good writing, really!

[archaic]

Part 23

Spoiler: Waterproofs.

"Hey there sleepy, that two mornings in a row you've still been asleep when I got in. That's either a coincidence, or is something up?"
Pasha woke, stretched, and blinked sleepily at Jean.
"Is something up? Not been sleeping so well? No, well, that floor in there, probably isn't the most comfortable thing to sleep on. What do you sleep on back home?"
They looked at each other blankly.
"You ..... " Jean pointed to the creature " ..... sleep ..... " Jean placed her hands palms together on the side of her face and closed here eyes, then pretended to snore.
She opened one eye " ..... sleep ..... " she then made expansive gesture to the floor in front of here " ..... on what?"
"Oel new oeyä niviti. Klltxay si txasunu ke."
"You know. If I didn't know better, I could genuinely believe that was language."
"Ma ketuwong, nga lu skxawng."
"I know it's not, but ..... still."
"Eltu ngayä hì'i lu. Hì'i nìtxan."
"Well the good news is we might possibly, if everything works out, possibly may stand a chance of possibly maybe getting someone who may potentially  take a look at possibly seeing if maybe there's anything to be possibly gained by analysing those vocalizations of your's, just in case there's anything to learn form that avenue of research. Maybe, if we're lucky, and the stars align and Candice doesn't veto them before they start. At least that's the idea. Personally, I'll believe it when I see it, but then, I've always been uncompromisingly optimistic."
"Oe tslam ke."
"Breakfast time, lets get you some of those O'hack."
"Oe lu ohakx."

Candice arrived with Warren, it was just before eight.
"It's bad out there."
"Monorail's closed. Busses are a disaster area, all of their own."
"Yeah, I biked in. I was glad of my waterproofs."
"I've seen those, where did you get them from?"
"I made them myself, high school project. I made fifty of them to sell, with the idea of setting up a side business to fund my college tuition."
"So what happened?"
"I sold ten or eleven, then a guy in a suit buys the rest, and bought out my designs. It paid for college all right. They never went into production, turns out he had some other product, and he was afraid mine would be too much competition."
"That's crumby."
"That's capitalism."
"It's bad capitalism, what they should've done, is run with their product for a couple of years, then introduced yours as a top of the line range and sold it at a premium." Candice, with feeling."
"So, how is Rooter ker-hair?"
"Sleepy again, I hope it's not a bad sign."
"Did it eat OK?"
"Yeah, appetite was exactly what I'd expect."
"Could it be the higher gravity than it evolved for?"
"I'm starting think you may be of some use round here after all."
"Err, thank you Candice."
"You're welcome, However, I wonder if we could simulate the magnetic field of Pandora. A magnet in the floor would be more practical than reducing the gravity."
"Fair point."

The day wore on. Samples were taken, Pasha wasn't keen. As usual, no one enjoyed the experience. The weather outside gradually improved.
Staff from the Pandoran research lab went home one by one. Candice was the last to leave, it was almost seven by the time she closed up the department, and headed for home.

"Kal-tih Pasha."
"Kaltxì ma Krìs. Kr'tsyes?"
"Crutches." Chris said, holding them up.
Pasha was getting slick at operating the airlock, she rounded up the balloons and was ready.
"Yeah, they're not an ideal solution, let's see what we can rig up down in maintenance. Mind you, I need to know what mixture of gasses you breath. Now where's that instruction manual?"
Chris found an online manual, followed the instructions to interrogate the vivarium for the gas mixture, there was a flow chart on screen, it showed a scrubber unit and recycle set up.
"You know, if we copy what's here, we should be able to make this work."
Chris stood on a chair, and took lots of pictures, if a little unsteadily.
Chris and Pasha used the lift, Chris pointed to which button, and Pasha pressed it. They went to the security suite.
"Francis?"
"Yeah? What's up?"
"We're going to maintenance, I'm going to see is we can't improvise some breathing gear."
"Had a feeling you would, sooner or later. Good luck with it!"
Five hours later, Pasha was yawning like crazy, Chris took the opportunity of returning her to her vivarium, to have a look to see if there was a spare filter. He hadn't appreciated how many separate rooms there were, twenty in total, most were full of glass cases with plants in. He found the labs store room. there was a large stack of replacement scrubber cartridges, so he took one.
The breathing apparatus wasn't finished by the end of Chris's shift, but he carried on for three more hours. He'd made good progress, but it was far from complete. In the end he stashed the whole lot in his locker and went home.

[Toliman]

Nice work again

[archaic]

Part 24

Spoiler: Digestive issues.

"Morning, something has changed, hasn't it? Three consecutive mornings you've still been asleep when I got in. I wish I knew what was going on. Or are you just getting used to our time? Are you jet lagged? Is that it? We know you're diurnal, maybe you synchronize on dawn, which I know isn't for a while yet. Local sunrise, oh eight hundred, and it's now ..... oh six fifty five."
Pasha's stomach rumbled.
"I take the hint."
Jean fetched the larvae and distilled water, placed them carefully on the floor just inside the chamber.
"O'hack, and what ever water is."
Jean made her way out of he airlock, and looked in. The observation window was useful that way.
"O'hack. Do they taste good? Not that you've any choice to be honest, it's the only thing we know you can eat."
"Oe ohakx lu ..... " the creature said, and stuffed several of the larvae into it's mouth with great enthusiasm, it picked out just a single larva, and held it delicately while it chewed it's mouthful, after some chewing it swallowed and held up the larva " ..... fiswirä lu teylu. Tey lu." it finished very slowly and carefully.
"So, this is your first weekend on Earth. I don't suppose you have weekends on Pandora, but we do on Earth. What happens is a week is seven days, five of them are work days, and the last two are the weekend, Saturday and Sunday. We work Saturdays, that's this department does, because we have months of back log to deal with. We moved out of our old lab outside Edinburgh, and came down to London. We were given to understand there would be a month or so break in the work, due to construction delays. One month became two, then three, and so one. Candice was tearing her hair out, so she bought a warehouse and we set up just temporarily. We were there way longer than any of us expected, but that's a story for anther time. Today is Sunday, no work today. Well, actually there is some, you need feeding, 'cleaning out', and pain relief. The good news is, no samples today. The bad news, no company. You'll probably hear the visitors through the wall, as they coo over how fascinating the alien artifacts are. Either that, or whine about how boring the silly rocks and crap are. There's some hardcore philistines out there. And I don't mean people from ancient Gaza and west central Israel."
"Morning Jean, sorry I'm late."
"Morning Geof, I wouldn't worry about it. I've only been here a couple of minutes."
"Fed it yet?"
"Yeah, just. Fed and watered."
"Well, OK, let it finish and then give it the injection?"
"Sounds good."
"How's it doing?"
"About half way."
"Anything planned for today?"
"Apart from coming back this afternoon, to feed, water, and inject Pasha again?"
"The PaSH?"
"Whatever."
"Yeah."
"Nope. Feet up, chill out."
"Not tempted to go round the museum?"
"Nope, you?"
"Yes, actually. I work here, I have a pass, free access to the whole museum."
"Not everything."
"Most of it, and staff discount on the pay on entry exhibits, refreshments and gift shop."
"You won't get round much of anything, not if you want actually look at the exhibits."
"I plan on spending Sundays going round, till I've seen it all."
"Good luck! The main block is twenty three whole site floors."
"You sure about that."
"OK, the 3 lowest basement floors are full site, there's a thirty meter perimeter round three sides of the building."
"And a thirty meter wide garden along the West side."
"Yeah, then the towers go up another thirty floors, nineteen are publicly accessible."
"And tower S four is the oddball, because only half this floor is accessible to the public."
"True, but the two grand halls are twelve floors high."
"Ah, yeah, but that includes the ground floor, which at twenty meters, is the same height as four normal floors, so it's really more like fifteen floors."
"Err, so?"
"Err, I can't remember what the point of that was, but, do you know how many display case kilometers there are?"
"I read that memo too. I didn't say it would be quick."
Jean put her hand in her pocket for her mini viewscreen.
"Memo. New British Museum. Size facts."
She tapped the on screen button to not have it read aloud.
"Here we are. Thirty four million, three hundred and seventy four thousand, one hundred and thirty six square meters of exhibition space."
"I read, that and queried it, turns out that's calculated, and doesn't take into account the support pillars, staircases elevator and service shafts."
"Yeah, well, it says here, there's eighty two hundred fifty kilometers of glass case frontage."
"I never said I'd achieve it quickly."
"Assuming you spend every Sunday, and every Bank Holiday going round, and assuming you do it justice and spend a day looking at an average of one kilometer's worth of artifacts, with the intention of actually learning about what you're looking at, I make that well over one hundred thirty seven years."
"I made it one three seven point five. Approximately."
"Did you allow for alterations? For special short term exhibits, for rearranging, changing, expanding and contracting exhibition stock?"
"Err, no actually, I didn't."
Informational plaques average out at approximately two point six six lines per artifact, there's an average of ten point three five words per informational plaque line, an average of eighteen point three artifacts per linear glass case frontage meter, for one thousand meters, I make that round about half a million words in a day. Assuming you read every word, on every plaque."
"Yeah, but I reckon on a reading speed of tree hundred plus words a minute, in excess of one hundred eighty thousand words an hour, that's less than three hours of reading time. Spread over eleven hours the museum is open, even allowing four hours for lunch, snacks, comfort breaks, personal social media interaction, and navigating to and from exhibitions, I'd suggest that's some pretty leisurely reading. At least by my standards."
"Well then, I wish you well in your endeavor!"
"Thanks. Speaking of endeavors, shall we?"
"Mmm. Pass the Stupitapan."
They administered the shot, cleaned the vivarium. Urine and fecal material were valuable as test samples, and were transferred into containers for distribution to a number of labs on Earth, in orbit, on the Moon and even one on Mars.
"Well, I don't really have much planned today. What I intended to do today I finished Friday night, What's next to do, won't be ready till tomorrow lunch time at the earliest. So ..... we could look round something together if you like?"
"Sure, why not? We're work colleagues, we're at work, but at work and not working."
"Mmm, shall we start with breakfast in the staff canteen?"
"That sounds like an excellent plan!"

Chris stood outside in the poorly lit street, he hit the intercom button at the museum's side door.
"Men in Black, secret headquarters."
"Is that a reference to me helping a certain museum resident?"
"All I'm saying is, if there's an alien invasion, I think we know who's to blame."
"Just lemmie in?"
"Password?"
"Xenopocalypse double agent."
"Close enough."
there was a buzz, the door popped open, and Chris entered, closing the door behind him.
"You're early."
"Yup."
"Any particular reason?"
"Maybe."
"And that would be dependent on ..... ?"
"Relevant factors."
"Such as?"
"Is the vending machine fixed?"
Scott and Miguel laughed, it was mostly faked, but the message was clear ..... no, the vending machine was not fixed.
"We got a kettle?"
"Yep."
"Does it work?"
"Yep."
"Is there water?"
"Yep."
"Do we have a good supply of tea?"
"Yep."
"Sweetener?"
"Yep."
"Milk?"
"Yep."
"Mugs?"
"Yep."
"Teaspoons?"
"Yep."
"Is there in any way, any kind of issue, however minor, with us making ourselves tea, either at this time, or at any time in the future?"
"Yep. I mean no. Err, well, there's supplies to last till Tuesday lunchtime, as long as nobody goes over board with the tea. There's some biscuits too."
"Nice!"
"No, they're not Nice biscuits."
"Chocolate digestives."
"Just don't go mad with 'em, there was issues gettin' 'em."
"Nah, true. They don't exactly grow on tree's."
"OK. Anything else we need to know?"
"Nope, same poo different twenty our hour period."
"No surprises there, then."
"Rumor is, you're building a portable rebreathing unit for the museums pet alien?"
"Yeah?"
"Yeah that's the rumor, or yeah you are?"
"Yeah."
"Which?"
"What?"
"He said 'which'."
"Are you actually building a portable rebreathing unit for the museums pet alien? Or is it just a rumor?"
"It's a rumor."
"Figures, didn't I say it was a stupid rumor, Scott?"
"You did."
"But it's a rumor that happens to be true."
"You ain't!"
"I ain't? What the hell's all that junk in my locker then?"
"You're crazy!"
"Agreed. Nuttier than squirrel poo."
"It passes the time."
"It better not affect poker night."
"Mmm!"
"About that, is it OK if I bring a plus one?"
"Chris's got a girl friend! Chris's got a girl friend!"
"Err no."
"Chris's got a boy friend! Chris's got a boy friend!"
"Funny."
"It's Francis, ain't it."
"Nope."
"Paul."
"Nope."
"Dino."
"Nope."
"Mark."
"Nope."
"Kyle."
"It better not be that bleeding Warren from Xenobiology!"
"Nope."
"Who then?"
"It's a surprise."
"You don't know anyone else!"
"You'd be surprised."
"Do they have a valve in the back, where you blow them up?" Miguel inquired suspiciously.
"Why am I not surprised that you know where the valve is on those things?" Chris replied with a knowing smile.
"Screw you!"
"Is it a professional poker coach? Coz the way I hear it, you could do with one."
"Nope. Not even close."
"It's his mum, isn't it." Miguel said conspiratorially to Scott.
"Reckon it must be." Scott said conspiratorially back.
"It's a surprise."
"You're not going to tell us?"
"You'll find out on Thursday."
"Seriously, after everything we've done for you?"
"Like what?"
"Like tea and biscuits, for a start?"
"Speaking of which ..... "
"Yeah, go on then."
"Is maintenance still about?"
"Nah, they went about half an hour ago. Why?"
"Oh, no reason." Chris, trying to sound casual and innocent.
"Yeah. Right." Scot wasn't buying it.
"What he said." and neither was Miguel.

[Toliman]

Very good work again!

[archaic]

Part 25

Spoiler: Sawdust and flavorings.

"Seriously?"
"Yeah, seriously."
"Think it'll work?"
"I don't see why not, it's basically just a normal rebreather pack, just with different gasses, scrubber and face mask."
"Plus a trolley to wheel it round on."
"Mmm."
"And where exactly are you going to keep?"
"Well."
"You're gonna have to keep it hidden, and there really isn't exactly anywhere where no one goes."
"Actually, I was going to put in the lost property store."
"Actually, you know what, that's not as bad an idea as it sounds."
"It was either that, or on top of a lift car"
"I wouldn't, they're filthy!"
"I know, I checked them out. I couldn't believe how bad they've got in such a short time."
"No one deep cleaned the lift shafts, when the rest of the place was done."
"Naughty!"
"Ran out of time, I'm told."
"Who were you talking to?"
"Maintenance. Tea's ready."
"There in a mo. Hang on, hang on, hang ..... on ..... And we're done."
"What, the whole thing?"
"Just the valve block."
"Oh."
"Right ..... " Chris said, delicately placing the carefully glued valve block on the bench " ..... after you, tea's getting cold."
Chris and Miguel headed out, Maintenance wasn't far from the security suite.
"Think you'll have it done for Christmas?"
"If it works, first time out of the box, yeah."
"And if it don't?"
"Who knows."
"Plan B?"
"What, is there one?"
"Yeah."
"Nope."
"I see you've really thought this through, then."
"Kinda winging it, I mean, how hard can it be?"
"I'll ask you that when you're done."
They walked for a while, the echoes of their footfalls alone, breaking the silence.
"These boot, they ain't exactly stealth, are they?"
"Nah, but good for scaring intruders off."
"You wish. It gives them time to hide, or set up an ambush. Either way, no good for catching anyone."
"And what would you do with a perp, if you did catch one?"
"Tape them to a chair in security, and call the cops."
"What if they've got a knife, or a gun?"
"Well, in that case, I don't want 'em hearing me coming."
"Back to the boots?"
"Back to the boots."
"You can slip 'em off, you know."
"And wear my socks out?"
"Put in for a new pair."
"They ain't uniform."
"I hear we may be getting uniform socks."
"I've been hearing for a while now, we'll be getting radios and body cams. I ain't seen em', mind."
"Fair point."
They walked the rest of the way, listening to the footfalls.
"Tony, you're in early."
"Not as early as some, I see."
"Someone has a project they're working on." Scot said pointedly.
"What you scheming?"
"Rebreather for Xenobioogy's pet alien."
"You're having a giggle!"
"Nah, it's true! He's doing a valve block for it right now!"
"Looks like it!"
"I'm just waiting for the glue to dry."
"And how long will that take?"
"Oddly enough, exactly the same amount of time as it's going to take me to drink a cup of tea. Hint, hint."
Scott handed Chris a mug of piping hot tea.
"Milk and sweetener?"
"Of course, just the way you like it."
Chris took a very small sip.
"Not bad, actually that's quite a lot nicer than the stuff out of the machine!"
"Yeah, well, it's made with actual tea! I think machine tea's just sawdust and flavorings."
"Wouldn't be surprised."
"So Chris, why d'you wanna work tonight so bad?"
"I'm trying to teach the alien some English, and I'm picking up the odd word of alienese."
"Any particular reason?"
"It's gotta beat the crap out of sitting in here, twiddling my thumbs for eight hours strait."
"You are allowed to go round the museum, you know."
"Yeah, I know, but with well over eighty five hundred kilometers to walk round, I think I'll give it a miss."
"We worked it out, if you can get round forty kilometers a shift, every single sift, it'll take best part of three and a half years to do a full lap of the museum. If they wanted it patrolled properly, they'd need to employ a whole army!"
"We worked that out 'n' all. what was it again?"
"If you wanted someone to walk past, any given place in the museum,as often as once an hour, you'd need to employ fourteen hundred and seventeen security staff, on shift at any one time."
"I can see that happening. Not! I mean they can't even sort out cameras and radios."
"Somebody was bored!"
"OK, I have a fun question, we're both here now, what are you two doing still still here?"
"Mark got a point."
"Mmm, outa here."
"Handover! So, museum ..... what do we need to know?"
"The musuem, it's a big building with stuff in it, but that's not important right now."
"Ask a silly question."
"Get a silly answer."
"Oh, actually, someone reported a fault in S4 tower, floor S, contractors were working on it most the day."
"Fixed?"
"Don't be silly. "
"Is anything round here?"
"They disconnected the unit, and they'll be back to try again later. Tomorrow is a 'possible[/i'], otherwise, we're looking sometime in January."
"Yay."
"Pretty sure that's everything, so, see you later indeterminate aquatic reptile."
"Sea turtle?"
"Might as well be."
"Thank goodness they've gone. Now, we can kick back and relax." Tony said, lying back on the bench seat.
"If you were any less unrelaxed, you'd be clinically dead." Chris said, sipping his tea.
"I'm planning on reading my book, what you got planned for the duller bits of tonight."
"Rebreather."
"I thought that was a wind up."
"Nope. Give it an hour, I'll go look in on it."
"And mean while?"
"More work on the rebreather, need to make sure the glue's stuck OK. But, more importantly, I'm going to enjoy a decent cup of tea."
"I think we should stop using the machine, this is so much better."
"I'm not arguing."
"OK, I have to ask, what's the long term intention with the space monkey?
"It's learning English, I'd like to know how far we can take it. Science team believe it can't talk, but we know better. Who knows what else we'll find out."
"So this is about one upping a self satisfied bunch of over achievers with doctorates, and that billionairess woman?"
"Err, I guess."
"Well, I'm in, sign me up."
"Err, OK."
"How's the tea?"
Chris drained the last of his tea.
"Hot, that wasn't cleaver."
"Water?"
"Mmm."

It was almost exactly an hour later that Chris called in on Pasha, she was waiting for him, balloons in hand, looking out of the balcony windows onto the cityscape beyond.
"Good evening Pasha."
"Gut ivning ma Kris."

[Toliman]

Read, great work again

[archaic]

Part 26

Spoiler: Diorama.

Maintenance had a reasonable sized shop, a couple of large benches, a drill press, and a selection of hand tools, including a selection of battery powered tools. There was a large battery charging station too. One wall was all lockers, opposite this was mostly tool wall, plus the obligatory departmental notice board. An office desk with computer and standard museum chair. The entry was a choice between the large roller shutter, or a standard office door beside it.
Chris wasn't there, and neither was Pasha.
"Oh, come on Chris, where've you got to?" Tony asked the empty shop, it didn't reply.
"OK Tony, if I was Chris, where would I be? Err. At home in bed, 'coz it's the first of my four off."

Chris and Pasha were elsewhere, Chris had found the huge human evolution exhibit. Starting at the Present Day section, they had taken a short cut, and skipped ten or twelve centuries.
Here, now, presently in the middle of the stone age, Pasha was looking with great fascination at a family of hunter gatherers. A diorama of interactive animatronics, reproductions of artifacts found across Europe, Africa and Asia, found on land, in swamps, rivers, lakes and beneath the sea. Even the back drop was a projected recreation, a landscape early man might well have recognized. Essentially, it was much like most of museum. And, much like the rest of the museum, everything had been powered down for the night. It didn't matter, Pasha had looked, and seen. Chris and Pasha had traded names for many artifacts, a huru was a cocking pot, a tukru was a spear, a tewng was a loincloth, a taronyu was a hunter and so many others Chris couldn't begin to remember them all. He had a sneaky suspicion that Pasha remembered most, and maybe all of them. But now she just looked, and it was a while before she spoke.
"Sempul." Pasha said pointing to the adult male in center of the group, standing with a bow and arrow, the simulated body of a small deer across his shoulder.
"Sa'nok." Pasha, pointing to the adult female, crouched over a cooking pot on a simulated fire, not presently switched on.
"'Evengan." the young male child.
"'Evenge." the young female child "Oe."
"That's you?"
"Srane, ìì, yes, mì." she stood looking at the floor some time, holding tightly to the hand rail as if it might be snatched violently away from her. She wiped away tears. Several times. At last she spoke again.
"Snotipx ma Peyafwi, snotipx." she took a deep breath, and looked up, at the diorama for some time, then at Chris.
"Kìpuvang te Tsanten Saìpxeytan." she again pointed to the presumably father.
"Srì'etxì te Tsanten Kìpuvangtan." she pointed to the boy "Oeyä tsmukan."
"Ansit te Tsko'ay Ska'karite." pointing to the mother "Oeyä sa'nu, nga lom lu oer. Peyafwi te Tsanten Ansitite si. Oeyä ..... " Pasha trailed off.
"That's your family, mom, dad, you have a brother? I guess you must really miss 'em, huh? I guess you don't know how far away they are. How could you grasp that? Four and a half light years, I know it's a figure that's been thrown around plenty in recent times, but if I'm gonna be honest, I'm not sure I can really get my head around it. I remember one guy being interviewed about it said, if you wanted to go round the equator enough times to go the same difference, you'd have to do it something like forty four and a half trillion times. At least, I think that's what it was."
"Pxefo lom lu oer nìtxan ..... ke tsun oe fìkem sivi ..... Oe kä ne'ìm."
Pasha turned away from the diorama, and headed to the staff only door that had provided their short cut, Chris opened it for her and accompanied her to her vivarium, neither spoke, Chris could see there was pain, both physically and  emotionally. Had it been a mistake? Perhaps. Only time would tell.


"Where the bleedin' 'ell've you been?"
"Went to see Pasha, we went and had a look at the neolithic section, in the human evolution exhibit."
"Figures, I guess. I expect your tea's probably stone cold. I left it for you in maintenance."
"Well, thanks, I'll see if it's still drinkable. Anything happen while I was gone?"
"Apart from your tea going cold? Oddly enough ..... no."
"Déjà vu?"
"Didn't you get that last night?"
"Yup, and the night before, and the night before that, and the night before that."
"Ever wanted something more interesting?"
"What, like watching paint dry?"
"Yeah."
"Not really, it may be dull as a ditch, but on nights you can do what you like."
"And as long as you don't break anything, or set off any alarms, no one gives a flying doohickey!"
"I wasn't going to say 'doohickey', but yeah."
"Mmm, how many jobs are there out there, where they pay you to do anything you want, and nothing at all?"
"Not enough Tony, not enough. Here, that tea's not going to drink itself, so, if you need me, I'm in maintenance. If you want me, call!" Chris, holding up his pocket sized viewscreen.

Edit;- a couple of fixes.

[Toliman]

Good reading, again

[archaic]

Irayo!     

[Toliman]

Kea tìkin 

[archaic]

Dang, I just noticed I missed the than you to Plumps, Tirea Aean and Toliman for their help with the Na'vi dialogue in part 26!
Need more sleep!

[Toliman]

Kea tìkin and good luck with another writing

[archaic]

Part 27

Spoiler: Of Mice and Men, Tokyo Drift.

Chris spent most the rest of the shift in maintenance's shop there was progress, but most of his time he was having to do research. By lunch time he was begging to question his sanity.
"Look what the cat dragged in." Tony, in a good mood.
"I make it lunch time."
Tony was leaning against the sink, the security suit's own dedicated kitchen was tiny, the counter top was basically filled by the smallish sink and drainer, the built in cabinets were space efficient rather than stylish, below the counter was a small refrigerator, above the sink was a built in microwave oven. There was just about room for one person to prepare a very simple meal. Or make tea.
"Yeah, me too. Tea?"
"Please."
"What you got?"
"Soup and a roll."
"Imaginative ..... What kinda soup?"
"Tomato."
"I haven't had tomato soup in ages."
"Me either, it was on offer at the store. So I bought a dozen tins." At this, Chris pulled the soup can from a pocket.
"Tinned soup."
"Yeah, well it was better than I expected, night before last."
"Bowl?"
"Please. And a spoon?"
"Here ya go."
"Cheers!"
"Tin opener?"
"Might help, these buggers are murder to chew though."
Chris put the spoon in his teeth, held the bowl under one arm and opened the soup can.
"What did you have last night?"
"Chicken soup." Chris managed with the spoon in his mouth.
Chris slid the opener into a pocket, before pouring the soup into the bowl.
"Tinned?"
"Uh'hu."
Tony opened the microwave without being asked, Chris handed him the soup, Tony slid it into the machine and closed the door.
"How long?"
"Err, sixty ..... " Chris took the spoon out of his mouth " ..... sixty seconds, stir, then heat for another sixty seconds."
"Also on offer, in the same store?" Tony, setting sixty seconds on the microwave.
"You know me too well!"
"You know, it's a good job we don't have fourteen hundred and seventeen on shift at any one time."
"What makes you say that?"
"Well, we'd need a bigger bleedin' kitchen for a start!"
"True!"
"So how's the rebreather going?"
"Slowly."
"Slowly?"
"Painfully slowly."
"Think it's do able?"
"It's not impossible. The question is, is it something I can put together."
"That was kinda what I was getting at."
"Dunno ..... a selection of off the shelf fittings and bits, some 3D printed bits, some bits I liberated from maintenance, some from xenobiology."
"Sounds like you got the parts, but have you got the skills?"
The machine pinged, Tony got a clean spoon from the drawer, stirred the soup carefully and reset the timer.
Chris held up his spoon and gave Tony a confused look.
" 'snot cooked really cooked, it's hygiene, init?"
"Err, yeah, well. Oh, and a pressure regulator I got form a thrift store."
"Convenient."
"I knew where there was one, but it's gonna want a rebuild. It's pretty ancient. And it looks it too."
"Difficult to rebuild?"
"Nah, I did one back in high school, shop class. New gasket and seals, I'll change the diaphragm 'n' all."
"Doesn't sound too hard."
"The two halves are screwed together, hopefully they come undone OK. There's the spring in there too, I remember being warned that sometimes the spring stays compressed when you open it. If you're not ready, it can make it fly apart when you're undoing the screws."
"Exciting."
"Yeah, never a dull day. I'm going to hold it carefully with a C clamp, just in case."
"Sounds like a plan."
"What about you, hows your night going?"
"I've read about a third of my book."
"And?"
"It's OK, it's not as good as the first two books in the series, I was warned it was the slowest in the series, but the ending is good, apparently."
The machine finished, Tony took the soup out and handed it to Chris.
"How's the soup?"
Chris took a small amount from the edge of the bowl, and blew on it before tasting it.
"Not bad, same as last time."
"You ever feel you missed your true vocation as a sales person?"
"Funny."
The sand ran out in a small hour glass thing, which Tony had been watching.
"Tea's brewed."
"Sweet!" Chris went and parked his soup and roll on the table, before returning for his tea.
"Here you go."
"Cheers."
They sat at the table, Tony took a tub from a pocket and placed it on the table, Chris took the opener from his pocket an placed it on the table, Tony took his pocket viewscreen and placed it on the table, and watched Chris to see what he'd do. Chris took out his pocket viewscreen and placed it on the table, and looked back at Tony to see what he'd do next.
"Yeah, I'm out."
"Yeah, me too. Unless you want some lint."
"I wouldn't want you to go without."
"That's very considerate of you."
"Never let it be said that I am anything other than considerate when it comes to another man's pocket lint."
Chris smiled.
"OK, what's in the tub?"
Tony opened it.
"Looks healthy." Chris said suspiciously.
"Yeah, the wife's idea."
"Softening you up for the divorce."
"You're funny."
The two sat, ate and when finished, drank their tea, and washed up.
"Rebreather?"
"Yeah, book?"
"Yup!"
"You'll finish that before the end of shift though."
"I expect so."
"Then what?"
Tony took another book from his bag.
"Of Mice and Men, Tokyo Drift." Chris read aloud.
"Fourth book in the series."
"Nice."
"Yeah, so I'm told."
"Well, see ya later."
"Yeah, good luck!"
"Thanks. I'm gonna need it."

It was almost four hours later when Chris next stepped into the security suite.
"The two stooges in yet?"
"Yes, we are." Laurence sounded annoyed, he wasn't keen on being referred to like that.
"And the name's Harshil, not Mohamed."
"If you say so."
"Mohamed is a Muslim name, I'm Sikh."
"I thought you said you were atheist. on account of you not wearing a turban?"
"Yeah, well, I'm a Sikh atheist, not a Muslim atheist."
"Is that even a thing?"
"Well, it is now. And I hope you've got that project of yours well hidden, coz maintenance are gonna be in before to long, you know."
"All tucked away safely in my locker, till tonight."
"Well naff off the pair of you, get some sleep, before the heat of the day makes that impossible."
"Oh, a comedian are we?"
"And what if I was?"
"Stick to the day job, fewer people will ask for a refund that way."

[Toliman]

Read, great work again

[archaic]

Irayo!

 

[Toliman]

Kea tìkin 

[archaic]

Part 28

Spoiler: Rooter ker-hair.

"Morning Candice."
"Morning Jean."
"So where are we at?"
"Pa, err, the PaSH was awake when I got in this morning."
"Oh, back to the old routine?"
"Mmm, ate normally, drank normally, normal urine and fecal material to collect and clean up. I think we should continue to monitor behavioral patterns, see if a couple of day's sleeping in was a one off episode, or if this morning was a blip."
"Agreed, makes sense."
"Anything else to report?"
"Nope."
"And how did Sunday go?"
"Pretty much a rerun of Saturday, just with fewer people about. In the department. I mean, there were plenty of visitors around the Museum."
"I heard it as busy."
"Only place it was quiet, was the staff canteen. Was going to try the viewing gallery, on S one, but the queue was ridiculous."
"Anything else to report?"
"Not from me, but the automated watering system appears to be working fine still, none of our hybrid plants show any ill effects from neglect over Sunday."
"So no change there then."
"Indeed."
"Any word from Geof?"
"About ..... ?"
"Is he staying with us, or is he jumping ship."
"I tried getting that out of him yesterday, it wasn't till we were administering the afternoon Stupitapan that he'd open up about it ..... "
"And?"
" ..... he's impossibly torn. Constantly changing his mind, all the time."
"It's a massive opportunity for him. I know we'll all miss him ..... "
"He'd leave a huge hole in the team."
"He would that, but I have a nasty feeling that eventually all the HTSCP research may well to end up under one roof. If he starts up the department, he'll be the head honcho, but if he stay's here with us, he could eventually end up as second or third fiddle to some one who ultimately has less experience with it. I'd rather he left here, and end up with the decent promotion deserves. I can't bare the idea of him just getting sidelined."
"I said essentially the same thing to him, myself."
"So?"
"An answer is proving to be basically unreachable."
"Do you think he needs a push?"
"I wondered that, but I think the rejection might do more harm than good."
"Is this about his childhood?"
"What do you know about it?"
"It wasn't happy."
"Now there's an understatement."
"And he won't talk to me about it."
"Me either."
"So what do you know about it?"
"His Dad ran off with his high school sweetheart on his eighth birthday, and never had any contact again after that. He had a new family, with which he had no contact what so ever. His Mom checked herself into a clinic when he was nine or ten. e was with an aunt for a while, but she died of what everyone at the time believed to be an overdose."
"It wasn't?"
"Nah, years later some grad student was working as an intern. They joined the dots, turns it was a bad batch of meds. The company recalled what they could discretely, but what had slipped out they buried, there were a number of deaths, which they covered up. He wound up going back and forth between from care and series of foster homes"
"Nice."
"The way I was told it, it's a wonder he's as well balanced, as he gives every outward appearance of being."
"Which is why he's a loner, who's always anxious to please?"
"I guess so."
"OK, change of subject. So, the PaSH, we've identified a signature vocalization. Shouldn't we use it?"
"Sounds reasonable to me."
"OK, from now on, at least internally, we refer to it by that."
"Rooter ker-hair it is then."
"It could hardly be anything else, it says it all the time."
"It sure say's it a lot."

"Speak."
"Delivery of live blue wales, for the Natural History Department."
"Just leave 'em by the door, department can fish'em in, in the morning."
"Right you are."
"Pass phrase?"
" 'There's something fishy about all this.' "
The buzzer sounded, and the door opened.
A few minutes later Chris appeared in the security suite.
"I hope you didn't leave 'em so people can trip over 'em." Miguel, smirking.
"You wouldn't even know they were there." Chris wasn't going to blink first.
"Tea?" Miguel offered.
"Machine?"
"Still bust. This is proper tea."
"But who's proper tea is it?" Scott called out from the kitchen.
"Well this one's my property." Miguel, clutching his mug firmly.
"We got some petty cash out of accounts, for supplies."
"Yeah, so we've a decent amount of tea, milk and sweetener."
"Biscuits?"
"We do, but accounts aren't paying for those."
"On account of there being a machine that sells em, and that one's not broken."
"Soon fix that."
"Early again?"
"So it would appear."
"Rebreather callin' you, was it?"
"Something like that."
"Tea. Just the way you like it." Scott, handing Chris his drink.
"In a mug." Miguel clarified.
"I'll drink to that."
"Bottoms up!"
"That's a filthy rumor."
All three took small sip of tea, there followed an shared moment of unspoken delight in a drink that wasn't just wet and warm.
"Well, as I have two hours till I'm officially supposed to be here, I might go and make a start. Call me if anything unusual happens."
"Like what?"
"World War Four, invasion of giant mutant sewer rats, earthquake, the building being on fire."
"Oh, I though you said 'unusual'. "
"I'm going away now."
"Bye then."
"Thank god for that, I thought he'd never go!" Scot said, very tongue in cheek.
"I can still hear you!" Chris called back sweetly.

"Chris!"
"Tony!"
"Chris."
"Tony."
"Chris."
"Tony."
"Chris."
"Tony."
"Chris."
"Tony."
"Sorry, haven't we met before?"
"I don't think so."
"Oh, the names Chris, you can call ..... Chris."
"Hi Chris, my names Tony. All my friend call me ..... Tony."
"Another night at the Mensa club house then."
"Uh ..... my brain hurts."
"How's the tea?"
"Better than usual."
"It is, isn't it. Or was, in my case."
"Shouldn't've rushed it then."
"I had it two hours ago."
"Shouldn't've rushed it then."
"It would've gone cold."
"There's always an excuse, isn't there?"
"From the very depths of my soul, I am most humbly and sincerely very very sorry, I'll never let entropy or the laws of physics to interfere with my tea drinking again."
"I should hope not! Some things are sacred!"
"Geed evening, by the way."
"It ain't that good."
"How come?"
"Well, we're here, ain't we."
"I can't argue with that. So, barely tolerable evening, Tony."
"And a barely tolerable evening to you Chris."
"Tony ..... "
"No, I'm Tony."
"Ma Kris."
"Pasha!"
"Gut ìv'nìng."
"Good evening Pasha."
"Good evening Pasha."

[Toliman]

Good work