Author Topic: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}  (Read 1040 times)

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Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« on: June 04, 2011, 02:06:32 pm »
 ;D
« Last Edit: June 06, 2011, 04:40:49 pm by Eana Ketuwong »
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Offline Lolet

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Re: Pandora [Comments/Feedback, Questions]
« Reply #1 on: June 04, 2011, 02:10:40 pm »
Great job on the beginning. I thought it was really sweet.  :D

Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Pandora [Comments/Feedback, Questions]
« Reply #2 on: June 04, 2011, 03:47:26 pm »
Great job on the beginning. I thought it was really sweet.  :D
Irayo, ma 'eylan!
Tumbling hard until 3 AM on a Wednesday night

Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Pandora [Comments/Feedback, Questions]
« Reply #3 on: June 04, 2011, 09:11:53 pm »
Added a small section to part one
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Offline Eichhörnchen

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #4 on: June 07, 2011, 12:15:58 pm »
Kaltxì

Okay English is not my mother tongue, but what I have read and understand is sooo cute. :-*
I hope this will be continued...

Irayo ma Eana Ketuwong, for this nice tale. :D


Eywa ngahu,

Eichhörnchen
kxetse sì mikyun kop plltxe


Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #5 on: June 07, 2011, 03:03:46 pm »
Kaltxì

Okay English is not my mother tongue, but what I have read and understand is sooo cute. :-*
I hope this will be continued...

Irayo ma Eana Ketuwong, for this nice tale. :D


Eywa ngahu,

Eichhörnchen


Irayo, ma 'tsmuk! It means a lot :) I will continue this fan fic. soon; I am currently in the writing process of Part One...
Again, irayo!

-Eana K.
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Offline Amaya

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #6 on: June 08, 2011, 12:50:10 am »
Just a gentle suggestion, you might want to pay a little more attention to the occasional tense-shifting.

For the most part, stories are written in past tense, but writing in present tense is acceptable too, as long as you stick to one :-*

(not that there's a lot of it, and this is something that tends to improve with time, but it's something to watch)
« Last Edit: June 08, 2011, 12:53:30 am by Amaya »

Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #7 on: June 08, 2011, 07:02:29 am »
Ah, yes thank you for pointing that out; I realize that myself and it's the one thing that I constantly worry about when I let others read what I've written.

I'm trying ti improe, and this is a good motivator.

Irayo,

Eana K.
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Offline Amaya

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #8 on: June 08, 2011, 11:14:57 am »
One thing that I've found helps for catching small errors is to read what I've written out loud.  You're using a different part of your brain, and it can twig onto stuff that your writing brain has blinders about since it knows what it meant to write. ;)

Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #9 on: June 09, 2011, 03:53:00 pm »
One thing that I've found helps for catching small errors is to read what I've written out loud.  You're using a different part of your brain, and it can twig onto stuff that your writing brain has blinders about since it knows what it meant to write. ;)
Thanks for the tip! It really worked, too; my friend read it aloud and I noticed a TON, but in just my opinion.

Irayo,
Eana K.
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Offline Eichhörnchen

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #10 on: June 10, 2011, 07:15:50 pm »
Kaltxì ma Eana Ketuwong

Again a beautiful part of the story. I like the Idea with the young Neytiri, but I think It's a little Beast. ( bug her Sempul ).  ;D ;D ;D
Can't wait to read more... :-*

best regards,

Eichhörnchen
kxetse sì mikyun kop plltxe


Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #11 on: June 11, 2011, 12:12:25 pm »
Kaltxì ma Eana Ketuwong

Again a beautiful part of the story. I like the Idea with the young Neytiri, but I think It's a little Beast. ( bug her Sempul ).  ;D ;D ;D
Can't wait to read more... :-*

best regards,

Eichhörnchen
Irayo! I have added a bit to part two...it's up now, but it is not finished.

Thanks again,
Eana Ketuwong
Tumbling hard until 3 AM on a Wednesday night

Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #12 on: June 12, 2011, 09:54:14 pm »
Added some to Part Two
Tumbling hard until 3 AM on a Wednesday night

Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #13 on: June 22, 2011, 09:44:15 pm »
Finished Part Two: Numeyu
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Offline Eana Ketuwong

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Re: Through Her Eyes {Comments, Suggestions, Questions}
« Reply #14 on: August 05, 2011, 09:45:42 pm »
Wow, it's been a WAY TOO LONG since I've added to the story. I'm truly quite sorry, but I've said before that there's been a lot going on in my life BUT I've worked on improving my writing skills, and I have a really good feeling on this chapter. Thank you if you've been waiting for me to add more; it's a sad thing that I haven't added anything but, again, too busy.

I've also been taking a break from Na'vi/Avatar (I FEEL TERRIBLE...) for personal reasons, but I've started to slowly get myself back into it, and things are starting to look up again.

Irayo,
Eana Ketuwong :)
Tumbling hard until 3 AM on a Wednesday night

 

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