Fifi's contest entry - Grammar discussion

Started by Tìtstewan, January 04, 2015, 05:14:36 AM

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Tìtstewan

I splitted and moved this part from this topic to keep a grammar discussion in the right place. ;)


So, here we go. :)

Quote from: Ftiafpi on January 03, 2015, 11:59:38 PM
Also, if I made any mistakes then please let me know. Being super rusty I'm sure that I made a few.

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Blue Elf

Well, if you are interested, I can describe some, but really take it just as explanation. It is not critique in any way.
Edit: seems someone was faster >:( ;D ;D
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Tìtstewan


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Blue Elf

Quote from: Tìtstewan on January 04, 2015, 05:14:36 AM
Hmm, I must say, that not all fixes seems to me correct. As I don't think here is appropriate place for deep analysis, I propose - if Ftiafpi is interested - to continue in discussion at better place, like Intermediate board.
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Tìtstewan

#4
Yeah, as I mentioned (PM I think) I haven't the files with the notes, so I did it completely again. :) Also, an original translation would be very useful. Of course, deep grammar analysis fit better in the intermediate section. :)
(If necessary, I'll split and move the posts to the right place)

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Ftiafpi

Yeah, I knew I made a few mistakes. Speaking of work, gotta catch up on the two weeks I took off before I can make a more meaningful response. A topic in the intermediate forum would be good.

Tìtstewan


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Kemaweyan

Quote from: Tìtstewan on January 04, 2015, 05:14:36 AM
4 Again, why not oel? because you used an adposition there (fa) that break case endings. Also, I am not sure what you intend to say with that sentence. Do you mean this: As for that, I study more for the benefit of learning the language. ???

Sorry, I don't understand this correction. First I don't see fa there. It seems that you mean a sentence Tsawri oel ftia fpi nerume lì'fyati nì'ul, right? So there is no fa in this sentence. There is adposition fpi only. But I don't understand why you say that it breaks case endings. Before you said the same thing about ta. Probably you understand this rule (about adpositions and case endings) incorrectly. Right, it «breaks» case endings, but only for noun which is related to this adp. I.e. adpositions could be used with nouns in nominative only. So *mì helkur or *mì helkut are incorrect. It should be mì helku only (without case ending). But it has no relation to other nouns (which are used without adpositions). And this rule is same for all adpositions.
Nìrangal frapo tsirvun pivlltxe nìNa'vi :D

Tìtstewan

Oh damn... I thought that fpi was related but I see it is related to tìnusume... And I meant fpi... Of course it's not wrong. Ngaytxoa. :-[ *editing that*

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Blue Elf

Quote from: Tìtstewan on January 04, 2015, 05:14:36 AM
Quote from: In this spoiler
Quote from: Ftiafpi on January 01, 2015, 09:06:29 AM
Lì'fyari leNa'vi peu sunu oeru frato?

Mrra zìsitkam J.C.-ìl ngamop relit arusikx alu Avatar nì'Ìnglìsì. Mawkrr neiew ftivia oel1 lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte furia nume futa2 plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u. Tsawri3Tsari oel ftia fpi nerume5 sìnusume lì'fyati nì'ul. Tafral oeru syäpaw6 Ftiafpi.

Nerume lì'fyatiri7 leNa'vi fwafula8 ngop ultxati hu numeyu alahe. Tengkrr ftia lì'fyati leNa'vi hu fayfo9 a sätare tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe fayforu10 oeyä tsmuk11. Furia oeru lì'fyayä hapxì sunu frato.

Mrra zìsiìtìri asìltsan ngaru oe seiyi irayo ma eylan sì haryu sì smuk nìwotx.
1 Why not oel? Because there is a modal use of the verbs: neiew ftivia X-it/ti/t and there, the patintive case drop. You could, of course, write that as Neiew oel futa ftivia lì'fyat(i) leNa'vi.
2 The verb nume is intransitive! The thing you learn goes in topic case: Lì'fyari oe nume. - I learn a language. or litarally: I acquire knowledge for a language
I remember me that quote by you:
Quote from: Ftiafpi on June 05, 2013, 08:52:07 AM
My goodness, can't believe how long I've been waiting to find out the transivity of nume.
That is, why I am surpised that you used nume transitively. :o
3 "tsawri" doesn't exist, I'm sure you mean tsari
4 Again, why not oel? because you used an adposition there (fa) that break case endings. Also, I am not sure what you intend to say with that sentence. Do you mean this: As for that, I study more for the benefit of learning the language. ???
5 I'm somehow sure that you intended to use a gerund there. So, <er> infix does not create gerunds. Be careful not to confuse the gerund and the progressive form of the verbs (both have a -ing ending, but different use).
6 One cannot use simply the <äp> infix in intransitive verbs.
7 See number 2
8 It has also to do with no. 2. The object is fì'u a = fwa.
9 "fayfo" make not much sense. Just ayfo for them. Frapo would be also possible.
10 See number 9
11 You talked about many people, so you would call them as your silbings, right? :)
Ok, so let's look at it, if we can improve something :)
Mrra zìsitkam J.C.-ìl ngamop relit arusikx alu Avatar nì'Ìnglìsì. All perfect.

Mawkrr neiew ftivia oel lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte nume futa plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u. Corrected to:
Mawkrr neiew ftivia oe lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte furia nume plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.
Here we must agree, that case endings in modal construction are somehow limited. You can check Naviteri post - order selected by Ftiafpi is unfortunately not allowed (see 5b example in mentioned post). You can change order to 9b, or to very common 8. In next part we can't use nume as vtr. and I even don't think topical works here well (aren't two verbs together strange?). IMHO fyape solves problem. So my version would be:
Mawkrr oel lì'fyati leNa'vi neiew ftivia ulte nume fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.
Mawkrr oe neiew ftivia lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte nume fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.


Tsawri oel ftia fpi nerume lì'fyati nì'ul. Corrected to:
Tsari oel ftia fpi sìnusume lì'fyati nì'ul.
Tsawri doesn't appear to me as wrong. Tsaw exists and -ri suffix doesn't break rules for syllable creation. But tsari is commonly used and I'd use it too. Again nume is incorrectly used as vtr., and even with adposition. I see what you tried to do, but although oe nerume = I'm learning and tìnusume = learning, these two are different! First is continuous form of verb, second is gerund (noun), so they differ in meaning and usage.
Corrected version is not correct because of noun nature of tìnusume - it can't be followed by patientive. So it should be changed to:
Tsari oe ftia fte nivume teri lì'fya nì'ul. - Related to that I study in order to learn more about language (preferred version).
Tsari oe ftia nì'ul fpi sìnusume lì'fyayä. - Related to that I study more for learning of the language.

Tafral oeru syäpaw Ftiafpi
Although äp is rarely used in intransitive verbs, I think it gives sense here. Meaning is "That's why I call myself Ftiafpi" - in that case you must remove dative: Tafral oe syäpaw Ftiafpi. (Form "Oe syaw oeru Ftiafpi" seems to me weird)
If you leave dative and remove äp, you get standard form "They call me Ftiafpi".
Tafral (fko) oeru syaw Ftiafpi.

Nerume lì'fyati leNa'vi fula ngop ultxati hu numeyu alahe. Corrected to:
Nerume lì'fyari leNa'vi fwa ngop ultxati hu numeyu alahe.
Here would be useful to know English version. I expect something like Learning Na'vi led to creating meeting with other learners or Learning Na'vi caused to create meeting with other learners.
So again we need to change nume to gerund form + genitive, what removes need of fula (fwa doesn't work with vtr :)). As I wrote in previous post, best version appear to me like this:
Tìnusumel lì'fyayä leNa'vi ngeykop oer ultxati a hu numeyu alahe. -> Learning of Na'vi caused me to create meeting with other learners.
Other forms are possible too, like
Tìnusumeri lì'fyayä leNa'vi oel ngolop ultxati a hu numeyu alahe -> Regarding learning Na'vi I created meeting with other learners.

Tengkrr ftia lì'fyati leNa'vi hu fayfo a sätare tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe fayforu oeyä tsmuk. Corrected to:
Tengkrr ftia lì'fyati leNa'vi hu ayfo a sätare tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe ayforu oeyä smuk.
I did some research and fayfo/tsayfo doesn't appear wrong, not to me only (see this). I would understand it as these ones(people)/ those ones (people). As you use plural, tsmuk at the end should be in plural too. I would just change a little middle part, as it appears to me not as subordinate clause, but another main clause:
Tengkrr ftalmia lì'fyati leNa'vi fayfohu, sätare (fayfohu) tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe fayforu oeyä smuk.

Furia oeru lì'fyayä hapxì sunu frato.
As I said/wrote in earlier post, corrected version is:
Fwa oe lu lì'fyayä hapxì sunu oeru frato

Mrra zìsìtìri asìltsan ayngaru oe seiyi irayo ma eylan sì haryu sì smuk nìwotx.
And in this last sentence you are thanking to many people, so use ayngaru. Personally I'd move nìwotx in front of oe seiyi irayo - it depends on what exactly you are trying to say. Both is possible:
For five good years I thank to you all, oh friends, teachers and siblings. VS For five good years I thank to you, oh friends, teachers and all siblings.

Take this my analysis like big grammar exercise only, maybe someone find it useful. Of course I'm open for other ideas - we still learn.
It was hell to write such big post on 1366*768 monitor. :) Now I need some rest ;D
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Tìtstewan

 :o Now that I call a really deep grammar analysis!
I'm glad that we are mostly on the same line regarding some sentences. Yeah, I was not 100% sure (without original translation...), therefore I didn't touched some sentences so much (also not as jury).
Also, I'm happy to see a different way of correction. Seiyi irayo! :D

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
It was hell to write such big post on 1366*768 monitor. :) Now I need some rest ;D
Ouch! It's time to get a bigger monitor such with 1920x1080, kefyak? :)

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Plumps

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
IMHO fyape solves problem. So my version would be:
Mawkrr oel lì'fyati leNa'vi neiew ftivia ulte nume fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.
Mawkrr oe neiew ftivia lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte nume fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.
But that's an indirect question, which comes down to an English modal construct "... and learn how to speak with beautiful Na'vi words."
Maybe, furia fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u (oe new) n(iv)ume.



Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Tafral oeru syäpaw Ftiafpi
Although äp is rarely used in intransitive verbs, I think it gives sense here. Meaning is "That's why I call myself Ftiafpi" - in that case you must remove dative: Tafral oe syäpaw Ftiafpi. (Form "Oe syaw oeru Ftiafpi" seems to me weird)
If you leave dative and remove äp, you get standard form "They call me Ftiafpi".
Tafral (fko) oeru syaw Ftiafpi.
I don't think that's possible. We had this discussion at some other place, IIRC. Grammatically it's not possible to use ‹äp› with an intransitive verb (as confirmed in this little comment conversation)
So, it remains to be seen how to express the phrase "I call myself". As a work-around I'd use oel tolìng oer tstxoti alu X


Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Tengkrr ftalmia lì'fyati leNa'vi fayfohu, sätare (fayfohu) tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe fayforu oeyä smuk.
I thought we use ‹er› with tengkrr ???

Blue Elf

#12
Quote from: Plumps on January 09, 2015, 01:35:02 PM
Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
IMHO fyape solves problem. So my version would be:
Mawkrr oel lì'fyati leNa'vi neiew ftivia ulte nume fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.
Mawkrr oe neiew ftivia lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte nume fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.
But that's an indirect question, which comes down to an English modal construct "... and learn how to speak with beautiful Na'vi words."
Maybe, furia fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u (oe new) n(iv)ume.

There's example from Paul, where pe- word is not used as question:
Pol pole'un futa pehem si nì'en. (source: Naviteri)
Since that time I'm not completely sure whether pe- words can be used in non question senetences or not, but I had feeling it is allowed ???

Quote
Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Tafral oeru syäpaw Ftiafpi
Although äp is rarely used in intransitive verbs, I think it gives sense here. Meaning is "That's why I call myself Ftiafpi" - in that case you must remove dative: Tafral oe syäpaw Ftiafpi. (Form "Oe syaw oeru Ftiafpi" seems to me weird)
If you leave dative and remove äp, you get standard form "They call me Ftiafpi".
Tafral (fko) oeru syaw Ftiafpi.
I don't think that's possible. We had this discussion at some other place, IIRC. Grammatically it's not possible to use ‹äp› with an intransitive verb (as confirmed in this little comment conversation)
So, it remains to be seen how to express the phrase "I call myself". As a work-around I'd use oel tolìng oer tstxoti alu X
Well, this is point where I'm not very sure, so I can be wrong. I'll try to find more. Until I fing some result, my second proposal appear to me as best. Your is good too, but looks quite long.
Quote
Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Tengkrr ftalmia lì'fyati leNa'vi fayfohu, sätare (fayfohu) tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe fayforu oeyä smuk.
I thought we use ‹er› with tengkrr ???
This looks like my fault, I wanted to use Tengkrr ftarmia.... I don't think tengkrr is limited only to present tense.

Anyway - thanks for comments.
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Plumps

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 02:17:40 PM
This looks like my fault, I wanted to use Tengkrr ftarmia.... I don't think tengkrr is limited only to present tense.

I don't think that either ;) What I meant was, a form of ‹er› ;)

Ftiafpi

#14
Tse, finally not busy. Coming back from a long vacation is always rough on the schedules.

This is a long reply and I'll try to address everything you all mentioned. Thank for all this discussion, it's really helping me dust off my Na'vi and get back into the swing of things.

First, let me give you what I intended to be the English translation of my contest entry:


Now, with that said I'm just going to blanket respond to much of your corrections with "DOH!"



My rusty Na'vi caused me to make many foolish mistakes that I shouldn't have made. A few below that bugged me:


  • Nume is intransitive! Duh Fifi, get it right already...
  • Tsawri vs tsari. This was me forgetting that tsaw is enclitic.
  • Oel vs oe. Products of me rushing my entry and not checking my work.
  • Forgetting the plural at the end, product of almost being done and writing the last sentence too quickly.

For more specific items please see my next post.

Tìtstewan

#15
Ngari txe'lan mawey livu, ma 'eylan! :D :) :)

Don't be so hard to you. I'm happy that you have participates at that contest even as you had less time. I'm proud of you! :D

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Ftiafpi

Quote from: Tìtstewan on January 04, 2015, 05:14:36 AM
5 I'm somehow sure that you intended to use a gerund there. So, <er> infix does not create gerunds. Be careful not to confuse the gerund and the progressive form of the verbs (both have a -ing ending, but different use).

Yep, I'm bad at identifying gerunds in English and constantly used to forget them in Na'vi. Bad habit coming back to bite me in the txìm. This was probably my biggest error in my opinion as it really screwed up the understanding of the sentence.

Quote from: Tìtstewan on January 04, 2015, 05:14:36 AM
9 "fayfo" make not much sense. Just ayfo for them. Frapo would be also possible.

My attempt with fayfo was to tie it back to the numeyu in the previous sentence. Either way works, though.

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Ok, so let's look at it, if we can improve something :)
Mrra zìsitkam J.C.-ìl ngamop relit arusikx alu Avatar nì'Ìnglìsì. All perfect.



Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Mawkrr neiew ftivia oel lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte nume futa plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u. Corrected to:
Mawkrr neiew ftivia oe lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte furia nume plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.
Here we must agree, that case endings in modal construction are somehow limited. You can check Naviteri post - order selected by Ftiafpi is unfortunately not allowed (see 5b example in mentioned post). You can change order to 9b, or to very common 8. In next part we can't use nume as vtr. and I even don't think topical works here well (aren't two verbs together strange?). IMHO fyape solves problem. So my version would be:
Mawkrr oel lì'fyati leNa'vi neiew ftivia ulte nume fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.
Mawkrr oe neiew ftivia lì'fyati leNa'vi ulte nume fyape plltxe fa Na'viyä lora aylì'u.

Yep, I entirely forgot about the modal needed to precede the dependent verb. Thanks for the link, I've read through it and it reminded me of a lot. Your corrected version sounds wonderful to say and is much appreciated.

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Corrected version is not correct because of noun nature of tìnusume - it can't be followed by patientive. So it should be changed to:
Tsari oe ftia fte nivume teri lì'fya nì'ul. - Related to that I study in order to learn more about language (preferred version).
Tsari oe ftia nì'ul fpi sìnusume lì'fyayä. - Related to that I study more for learning of the language.
Makes sense, looks like I have much more sìnusume lì'fyayä to be doing. ;)

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Tafral oeru syäpaw Ftiafpi
Although äp is rarely used in intransitive verbs, I think it gives sense here. Meaning is "That's why I call myself Ftiafpi" - in that case you must remove dative: Tafral oe syäpaw Ftiafpi. (Form "Oe syaw oeru Ftiafpi" seems to me weird)
If you leave dative and remove äp, you get standard form "They call me Ftiafpi".
Tafral (fko) oeru syaw Ftiafpi.
This was the result of me trying to be clever. I had honestly forgotten that <äp> doesn't work well (or at all?) with intransitive verbs but in this case it just seemed more "natural" than the obvious Oe syaw oeru Ftiafpi. Using <äp> I couldn't find anything obviously incorrect with and using fko didn't make sense to me as this is what I started calling myself and therefore was prior to any fko's getting involved with calling to me. Does this make sense?

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Nerume lì'fyati leNa'vi fula ngop ultxati hu numeyu alahe. Corrected to:
Nerume lì'fyari leNa'vi fwa ngop ultxati hu numeyu alahe.
Here would be useful to know English version. I expect something like Learning Na'vi led to creating meeting with other learners or Learning Na'vi caused to create meeting with other learners.
Your guess of my intended meaning is correct and your correction makes perfect sense. I definitely butchered this sentence. Not quite sure why I didn't use <eyk> as it fits perfectly with what I was trying to say.

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Tengkrr ftia lì'fyati leNa'vi hu fayfo a sätare tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe fayforu oeyä tsmuk. Corrected to:
Tengkrr ftia lì'fyati leNa'vi hu ayfo a sätare tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe ayforu oeyä smuk.
I did some research and fayfo/tsayfo doesn't appear wrong, not to me only (see this). I would understand it as these ones(people)/ those ones (people). As you use plural, tsmuk at the end should be in plural too. I would just change a little middle part, as it appears to me not as subordinate clause, but another main clause:
Tengkrr ftalmia lì'fyati leNa'vi fayfohu, sätare (fayfohu) tsawl slamu ulte set syaw oe fayforu oeyä smuk.

I used fayfo mainly as a way to further attribute this sentence to the "numeyu" from the previous sentence but this may be just my English trying to influence my Na'vi. I do agree about it being another main clause as that bugged me when I was writing it. Also, darn plurality not agreeing with each other... I used to be good at this...  :-\

Any reason you put hu+ as a suffix rather than before the word? Or was this just your personal preference?

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Furia oeru lì'fyayä hapxì sunu frato.
As I said/wrote in earlier post, corrected version is:
Fwa oe lu lì'fyayä hapxì sunu oeru frato
Makes perfect sense.

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Mrra zìsìtìri asìltsan ayngaru oe seiyi irayo ma eylan sì haryu sì smuk nìwotx.
And in this last sentence you are thanking to many people, so use ayngaru. Personally I'd move nìwotx in front of oe seiyi irayo - it depends on what exactly you are trying to say. Both is possible:
For five good years I thank to you all, oh friends, teachers and siblings. VS For five good years I thank to you, oh friends, teachers and all siblings.
Yep, stupid mistake on the plural. I also do agree that putting nìwotx in front is better, otherwise it's hiding behind the list of people and gets lost as to what it attributes to.

Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Take this my analysis like big grammar exercise only, maybe someone find it useful. Of course I'm open for other ideas - we still learn.
It was hell to write such big post on 1366*768 monitor. :) Now I need some rest ;D

You two are far too kind. Thanks for the analysis from both of you. I now see why you said my entry was "old fashioned" as I too see how many mistakes I made that are likely the product of old habits and old information (nume being the most obvious). Now that I have a small amount of more free time I definitely plan to get back into using Na'vi more often and being more active on the forums. Hopefully I wont be quite so rusty next time I pull out the ol' dictionary.

Ftiafpi

Quote from: Tìtstewan on January 12, 2015, 04:28:58 PM
Ngari txe'lan mawey livu, ma 'eylan! :D :) :)

Don't be so hard to you. I'm happy that you have participates at that contest even as you had less time. I'm proud of you! :D

Kehe! Zene fko nivumeie nìtxan! ;) :D

Ftiafpi

Quote from: Ftiafpi on January 12, 2015, 05:04:35 PM
Quote from: Blue Elf on January 09, 2015, 12:44:54 PM
Tafral oeru syäpaw Ftiafpi
Although äp is rarely used in intransitive verbs, I think it gives sense here. Meaning is "That's why I call myself Ftiafpi" - in that case you must remove dative: Tafral oe syäpaw Ftiafpi. (Form "Oe syaw oeru Ftiafpi" seems to me weird)
If you leave dative and remove äp, you get standard form "They call me Ftiafpi".
Tafral (fko) oeru syaw Ftiafpi.
This was the result of me trying to be clever. I had honestly forgotten that <äp> doesn't work well (or at all?) with intransitive verbs but in this case it just seemed more "natural" than the obvious Oe syaw oeru Ftiafpi. Using <äp> I couldn't find anything obviously incorrect with and using fko didn't make sense to me as this is what I started calling myself and therefore was prior to any fko's getting involved with calling to me. Does this make sense?

Just re-read some of the stuff about sno. This seems to be the place where I should be using it.

Thus; Tafral snor oe syäpaw Ftiafpi

Tìtstewan

No, sno is a third-person reflexive pronoun. It doesn't work for first or second person. The safe way is Tafral (oe) syaw oer Ftiafpi if you intend to say: I call myself Ftiafpi

I got the idea to use a completely other construction that would work but I'm not sure if a Na'vi would find that ok:
(Oel) tìng oer tstxot alu Ftiafpi.
I give me the name Frtiafpi.

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