Author Topic: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading  (Read 1391 times)

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Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« on: January 28, 2012, 12:17:51 pm »
All right, so I was reminiscing last night about the joys of elementary school and an old song came to mind, a spoof of "This Land is Your Land"  I don't put this in the Fandom Song Board simply because I don't plan on recording it or uploading it to YouTube or any of that fun stuff.  I would just like the lyrics for my own peace of mind.

I don't quite remember the original lyrics, but I definitely remember the spoof.

This land is my land
It isn't your land
I have a shotgun
And you don't got one
If you don't get off
I'll blow your head off
This land was made for me not you

Atxkxke lu pum oeyä
Po lu ke pum ngeyä
Lu oeru ikran
Lu ngaru ke po
Txo nga ke hum
Ikranìl nga yayom
Atxkxe lu oeru ke ngaru
The land is mine
It is not yours
(The me is an ikran)
(It is not to you)
If you do not leave
The ikran will yom you
The land is for me not for you
Yes, we did used to sing this in elementary school...and it was a Christian elementary school. ;D


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline `Eylan Ayfalulukanä

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #1 on: January 28, 2012, 12:48:58 pm »
HRH Nang!!

I hadn't heard this one before. Certainly not meoauniaea but a lot of fun nevertheless!

 :)

Yawey ngahu!
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Offline Tirea Aean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #2 on: January 28, 2012, 12:52:12 pm »
This land is my land
It isn't your land
I have a shotgun
And you don't got one
If you don't get off
I'll blow your head off
This land was made for me not you
Fìatxkxe lu (pum) oeyä
ke lu pum ngeyä
Lu oeru ikran
Ke Lu ngaru po
Txo nga ke hivum
pol ngati yasyom
Atxkxe lu oeru ke ngaru
This land is mine
is not yours
(To me is an ikran)
(He is not to you)
If you do not leave
He shall yom you
The land is for me not for you

Made some edits. AWESOME HRH I think I remember this from back in the day. O_O
« Last Edit: January 28, 2012, 12:55:03 pm by Tirea Aean »

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Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2012, 12:56:50 pm »
HRH Nang!!

I hadn't heard this one before. Certainly not meoauniaea but a lot of fun nevertheless!

 :)
Oh, no kidding.  We got a real kick out of it in 3rd grade. ;D


This land is my land
It isn't your land
I have a shotgun
And you don't got one
If you don't get off
I'll blow your head off
This land was made for me not you
Fìatxkxe lu (pum) oeyä
ke lu pum ngeyä
Lu oeru ikran
Ke Lu ngaru po
Txo nga ke hivum
pol ngati yasyom
Atxkxe lu oeru ke ngaru
This land is mine
is not yours
(To me is an ikran)
(He is not to you)
If you do not leave
He shall yom you
The land is for me not for you

o.o Nice.  And it even fits the tune (after some working).

Fìatxkxe lu oeyä
Ke lu pum ngeyä
Lu oeru ikran
Ke lu ngaru po
Txo nga ke hivum
Pol ngati yasyom
Atxkxe lu oeru ke ngaru

*gives cookies*

Ma Tirea, stop editing!  You're making me edit! ;D

This actual spoof or the original TLIYL?
« Last Edit: January 28, 2012, 12:58:38 pm by Tanhì Mì Ton »


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline Kamean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #4 on: January 28, 2012, 01:21:54 pm »
Suneiu oer. :)
Tse'a ngal ke'ut a krr fra'uti kame.


Offline Tirea Aean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #5 on: January 28, 2012, 01:56:40 pm »
HRRH! ! You KNOW my editing OCD.  ;D

Yes, I remember most of the original, and most of the spoof. Being college 3rdyear, It's been a little while since elementary school hrh

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Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #6 on: February 04, 2012, 05:49:11 pm »
Hi there.  Stranger Come Knocking again.  I didn't want to create a whole new thread, so I figured to just add my two new diddies right here.




I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline 'Oma Tirea

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #7 on: February 04, 2012, 11:34:00 pm »

Oeru sunu ;D

[img]http://swokaikran.skxawng.lu/sigbar/nwotd.php?p=2b[/img]

ÌTXTSTXRR!!

Srake serar le'Ìnglìsìa lì'fyayä aylì'ut?  Nari si älofoniru rutxe!!

Offline Tirea Aean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #8 on: February 05, 2012, 08:38:56 am »
HRH txntsan

I might be back for this. But for now, I say I like these ;D

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Offline Kamean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #9 on: February 05, 2012, 09:55:53 am »
Suneiu oer. :D ;D
Tse'a ngal ke'ut a krr fra'uti kame.


Offline Blue Elf

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #10 on: February 05, 2012, 01:18:32 pm »
HRH, nice :)
Just some notes:
Txolìng pot fpi swaw
Po kolä ulte rolun ‘awm
Saronyul tololtem ayswizawit (btw, it is question whay we shoot - arrows or prey ? Exact usage of "toltem" is not clear yet)
Fìaylì’u nga plltxe?
Nga ke tsun pivlltxe san lu frapor fpxafaw,
Moel tel wayt a plltxe ta sute perawm ...ìì, ke tslam...
Nga lu alaksi fpi tsa’u? (ts lenites to s)
Ftivang li(r)vu ‘ipu.
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Offline Tirea Aean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #11 on: February 06, 2012, 12:16:06 pm »
^^

1. Swawo
2. 'Awmit
3. Good point
4. faylì'ut ngal plltxe srak

6. Moel tel wayit a sutel peng ...(continued on next line)

8. tsari nga lu alaksi srak?

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Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #12 on: February 06, 2012, 04:38:02 pm »
HRH, nice :)
Just some notes:
Txolìng pot fpi swaw
Po kolä ulte rolun ‘awm
Saronyul tololtem ayswizawit (btw, it is question whay we shoot - arrows or prey ? Exact usage of "toltem" is not clear yet)
Fìaylì’u nga plltxe?
Nga ke tsun pivlltxe san lu frapor fpxafaw,
Moel tel wayt a plltxe ta sute perawm ...ìì, ke tslam...
Nga lu alaksi fpi tsa’u? (ts lenites to s)
Ftivang li(r)vu ‘ipu.
Haha.  All right, I guess I'm not being entirely fair.  Not everyone has seen VeggieTales or Silly Songs with Larry.



It isn't supposed to make sense or be entirely clear.  It's rhyming for the sake of rhyme and rhythm.

^^

1. Swawo
2. 'Awmit
3. Good point
4. faylì'ut ngal plltxe srak

6. Moel tel wayit a sutel peng ...(continued on next line)

8. tsari nga lu alaksi srak?

Are these specific line corrections? ???


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline Tirea Aean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #13 on: February 06, 2012, 04:45:34 pm »
^^

1. Swawo
2. 'Awmit
3. Good point
4. faylì'ut ngal plltxe srak

6. Moel tel wayit a sutel peng ...(continued on next line)

8. tsari nga lu alaksi srak?

Are these specific line corrections? ???

They were @BlueElf. sorry I wasn't clear.

So it rhymes for the sake of rhyming with disregard to grammar?
« Last Edit: February 06, 2012, 04:47:07 pm by Tirea Aean »

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Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #14 on: February 06, 2012, 04:59:05 pm »
^^

1. Swawo
2. 'Awmit
3. Good point
4. faylì'ut ngal plltxe srak

6. Moel tel wayit a sutel peng ...(continued on next line)

8. tsari nga lu alaksi srak?

Are these specific line corrections? ???

They were @BlueElf. sorry I wasn't clear.

So it rhymes for the sake of rhyming with disregard to grammar?
Well, not total disregard for grammar.  More of a...if it fits, go ahead and use it.  Otherwise...get creative. *shifty eyes*


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline Tirea Aean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #15 on: February 06, 2012, 05:02:21 pm »
If that's the context then disregard all grammar fixes :P


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Offline Stranger Come Knocking

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #16 on: February 06, 2012, 05:04:37 pm »
If that's the context then disregard all grammar fixes :P


So there is nothing to be done?  No way to kinda squish it into the mold while still being grammatically correct?


I will not die for less
I dug my grave in this
Will I go before I fall
Or live to slight the odds?

This is my book.  You should check it out.  Speculative sci-fi murder mystery.

Offline Tirea Aean

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Re: A Little Diddy Two-Minute Project Needs Proofreading
« Reply #17 on: February 06, 2012, 05:07:37 pm »
Surely with time and a Na'vi Rhyme Dictionary it Can be done :D

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