Ulte tsakrr lu swaw...

[Puvomun]

Ulte tsakrr lu swaw...

Swaw a ngal tse'a keyit
Swaw a ngal stawm mokrit

Tsa'u lu swaw a nga ftang tìtse'a ulte sngä'i tìkame
Nga sngä'i tsive'a kxamlä ngeyä txe'lan
Ngeyä menari sung tì'efuru.
Lrrtok sung tì'efuru nì'ul.

Tsakrr lu swaw a ngal omum san Nga yawne lu oer.

[Blue Elf]

Txansana poem, ma Puvomun! I like it.

some comments:
I'm sure if you can use this: Tsa'u lu swaw a nga ftang tìtse'a ulte sngä'i tìkame.
Either use standard modal construction without object: Tsa'u lu swaw a nga ftang tsive'a ulte sngä'i kivame or it should be rephrased, something like:
Tsa'u lu swaw a nga tìftang si tìtse'ar ulte sngä'i tìkamer

Nga sngä'i tsive'a fa ngeyä txe'lan
Ngeyä menaril sung tì'efut.
Lrrtokìl sung sì'efut nì'ul.

In the last sentence, omum is transitive, but object is replaced by direct speech, so probably ngal should be nga, or whole sentence should be changed like:
Tsakrr lu swaw a ngal omum futa nga yawne lu oer.

Well, I hope I wasn't too wrong 

[Puvomun]

Nga sngä'i tsive'a fa ngeyä txe'lan

Guess what... fa is what I had in the first place and decided to change it...

Ngeyä menaril sung tì'efut.
Lrrtokìl sung sì'efut nì'ul.[/i]

Wiya, I should have caught that with sung...

Irayo, ma Blue Elf!

[Tswusayona Tsamsiyu]

wou. I really like this one. nice one.
agree with all of Blue Elf's corrections.

Txansana poem, ma Puvomun! I like it.

some comments:
I'm sure if you can use this: Tsa'u lu swaw a nga ftang tìtse'a ulte sngä'i tìkame.
Either use standard modal construction without object: Tsa'u lu swaw a nga ftang tsive'a ulte sngä'i kivame or it should be rephrased, something like:
Tsa'u lu swaw a nga tìftang si tìtse'ar ulte sngä'i tìkamer

sngä'i is modal so you have to use it with <iv>. and than it's better to do so with ftang too.

Nga sngä'i tsive'a fa ngeyä txe'lan

I wouldn't say it's better cause it's the only choice. kxamlä is "through" physically.

[Puvomun]

wou. I really like this one. nice one.
agree with all of Blue Elf's corrections.

Txansana poem, ma Puvomun! I like it.

some comments:
I'm sure if you can use this: Tsa'u lu swaw a nga ftang tìtse'a ulte sngä'i tìkame.
Either use standard modal construction without object: Tsa'u lu swaw a nga ftang tsive'a ulte sngä'i kivame or it should be rephrased, something like:
Tsa'u lu swaw a nga tìftang si tìtse'ar ulte sngä'i tìkamer

sngä'i is modal so you have to use it with <iv>. and than it's better to do so with ftang too.

Nga sngä'i tsive'a fa ngeyä txe'lan

I wouldn't say it's better cause it's the only choice. kxamlä is "through" physically.

Irayo si ngaru nìteng, ma 'eylan. I am glad there are not more errors in this, and most of them stupid ones... 

[Tswusayona Tsamsiyu]

of course. one can with no doubt now say that you are a pretty advanced Na'vi speaker.

[Tirea Aean]

Ulte tsakrr lu swaw...

Swaw a ngal tse'a keyit
Swaw a ngal stawm mokrit

Tsakrr lu swaw a nga ftang tsive'a ulte sngä'i kivame
Nga sngä'i tsive'a fa ngeyä txe'lan
Ngeyä menaril sung sì'efut.
Lrrtokìl sung sì'efuti nì'ul.

Tsakrr lu swaw a ngal omum futa Nga yawne lu oer.

My edits, basically all the stuff that's already been mentioned.

I really like this. I hope to write a NN short story or freeverse poem sometime soon.

[Puvomun]

Ulte tsakrr lu swaw...

Swaw a ngal tse'a keyit
Swaw a ngal stawm mokrit

Tsakrr lu swaw a nga ftang tsive'a ulte sngä'i kivame
Nga sngä'i tsive'a fa ngeyä txe'lan
Ngeyä menaril sung sì'efut.
Lrrtokìl sung sì'efuti nì'ul.

Tsakrr lu swaw a ngal omum futa Nga yawne lu oer.

My edits, basically all the stuff that's already been mentioned.

I really like this. I hope to write a NN short story or freeverse poem sometime soon.

Irayo, ma Tirea Aean. Certain situations bring out certain feelings.
And writing freeverse poems is fun.

[Tirea Aean]

Try readig a na'vi freeverse poem out loud. it sounds beautiful!!

edit: that gives me an idea....

[Sireayä mokri]

Lahea pum atxantsan ma Puvomun

I really like this. I hope to write a NN short story or freeverse poem sometime soon.

Ayoe nìwotx pereiy

[Puvomun]

Try readig a na'vi freeverse poem out loud. it sounds beautiful!!

I know! I was surprised, in a good way.

edit: that gives me an idea....

Uhm... do we need to "uh-oh" now?

Lahea pum atxantsan ma Puvomun

Irayo, ma Sireyä Mokri

[Kamean]

Sunu oer nìtxan.

[Alyara Arati]

Ulte tsakrr lu swaw...

Swaw a ngal tse'a keyit
Swaw a ngal stawm mokrit

Tsakrr lu swaw a nga ftang tsive'a ulte sngä'i kivame
Nga sngä'i tsive'a fa ngeyä txe'lan
Ngeyä menaril sung sì'efut.
Lrrtokìl sung sì'efuti nì'ul.

Tsakrr lu swaw a ngal omum futa Nga yawne lu oer.

And writing freeverse poems is fun.

Mllte oe ngahu.   Ulte mllte oe frapohu alahe; lor nìtxan lu faylì'u ngeyä! :')