Author Topic: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì  (Read 1330 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Eltusiyu

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 1088
  • nv Eywa'eveng
  • Karma: 13
    • Kxangangang!
Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« on: June 01, 2011, 05:09:52 am »
Tìtaron Neytiriyä

Mipa trr sngerä’i. Set lu krr a sute syaw tsa’uru rewong. Neytirìl tìhahawit ftìlmang.
Tsaw ke lìyängu poru lepfoma trr. Fì’ut pol eromängum taluna fìtrrìri lu ‘awvea trr Numtsengeyä Sawtuteyä.
Fra’evi Omatikayaä a solalew zìsìt akinä tsun nivume tsatsengero. Tsaysì’eful leykamatängem frasuteti keftxo.
Tsam hu Tsayhetuwong ke längu fpom Na’viru…
Frasute txopu serängi furia Sawtute nirvew fmivängi skiva’a  tìtxurit soaiatisì Na’viyä alu tsayevi.
Tsaw lu Kawnga Unil frasute Omatikayaä. Slä tsatseng Graceyä lu. Poe lu ‘eylan Na’viyä.
Omeium Neytiril futa Poel ke tivung futa Samsiyul Sawtuteyä tìsraw seykivi evengit kawkrr.

Pori lerängu meyp ulte ‘eferängu tìohakxit. Fperìl tìtaronteri.
Omatikayaä ‘itel pìlme’eiun futa poe kivä hu peyä Ikran alu Seze ne tìtaron fìtrr.
Set Tsahìktsyìp kerä neKelutral fte pivängkxo hu Mo’at Neytiriyä sì’efuteri ulte mawtìplltxe poe nìyevew kivä fte tivareion hu Seze.
Fìsäfpìl sleykìmeiu poti nìtram. Fìkrr ke lu som poru.
Tsun kiveiä nìwin kxamläna’rìng fte pivate Kelkumì Na’viyä ulte ultxa siveiyi hu
Soaia eylansì peyä. Sa’nu Neytiriyä alu Mo’at lu Tsahìk Omatikayaä. Poe yawne lu Neytirir.
Mo’at tìhawnu seri ‘iteru krr a poel tsasrungit kivin. Set Ney lu stum fyeyntu ulte lereiu alaksi fte slivu mipa Tsahìk olo’ä.
Txo nirvew slivu Nawma Sa’nok, poe zene ftivängey muntxatanit. Ke new tsakem sivängi.

Krr a pol tsole’eia Kelutralit Na’viyä, tsaw teya seiyi poru. Swoka Ultral alu Kelku frapeyä sì frayioangä ulte tìhawnu seri fra’ur alu hapxì Eywa’evengä.
Neytiri kereiä kakxamtseng kelkuyä a sute tok frakrr. Tsu’tey tìng nari poru. Kìlmä eoPoeri
-Ma Tsu’tey! Kameie Ngati.
-Ma Tsmuke, ngaru lu fpom srak?
-Srane. Lu oe meyp slä lefpom.
-Ayoe txopu sìlmäng tsnì nga ke new tivok fìtsengit. Oeru txoa livu. Oeri tsap’alute sereiyi ngar. Oe ke namew tìsraw seykamängi sì’fumit ngeyä.
-Kea tìkin. Oeyä txoa leru ngaru, ma tsumkan. Slä tsakem rä’ä sivi kawkrr!- Pìmlltxe Neytiri
-Tam. Lu ngaru txele a oe tsivun srung siveiyi ngar?
-Srane. Zene oe fwivew Tsahìkit. Ngal omum tsenget a poe tok, srak?
-Mo’at hu Samsiyu evisì kamä neNumtseng Hewongä! Ngal terok fìtsengit hawngkrr nìhawng.- Tsaw lu lora aylì’u a Tsu’tey pìmeng

Neytiri nerew tsngivawvängìk… Slä set olo’ lu kxuke. Po tsun kivä fte tivaron. Kxawm tsakemìl sleykivu poti nìtram. Tìzawngìlìri Sezeyä a poe stameiawm, tìmìng tìsìlpeyit poru.



I wrote this about six months ago.. So please, show my mistakes :P I'll correct them and write the second part:)
« Last Edit: June 01, 2011, 08:33:44 am by Kxrekorikus »

Kxangangang! - Oeyä Pìlok leNa'vi

Previously called Kxrekorikus

Offline Blue Elf

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 5502
  • cz Czech Republic
  • Karma: 112
    • My attempt for blog
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'avwea Hapxì
« Reply #1 on: June 01, 2011, 08:18:35 am »
Good job! It is quite long story and I read it only quickly to get overview. It is understandable well, although mistakes are here. Some of them:
- kewong should be ketuwong (you use it as noun, but kewong is adjective)
- sngereä’i should be sng<er>ä’i
- tìohakit
should be tìohakxit
- Omatikayaä ‘itel pìlme’eiu futa ... - don't understand this. Sounds like p<ìlm>e’<ei>u, but pe'u is not verb and can't take infixes.

What surprises me is how often you are using mood infixes (<äng>, <ei>) and subjunctive, I don't think it is correct. But more experienced people say us more.
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Offline Eltusiyu

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 1088
  • nv Eywa'eveng
  • Karma: 13
    • Kxangangang!
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #2 on: June 01, 2011, 08:33:22 am »
Irayo, ma Blue Elf :)

I corrected those mistakes and marked them by red font
I have written "pe'un" but while copying I ate "n" xP so it looked like pe'u..

Kxangangang! - Oeyä Pìlok leNa'vi

Previously called Kxrekorikus

Offline Sireayä mokri

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 6012
  • Karma: 35
  • Veritas vos liberabit
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #3 on: June 01, 2011, 08:54:38 am »
Mipa trr sngerä’i. Set lu krr a sute syaw tsa’uru rewong. Neytirìl tìhahawit ftìlmang hivahaw*.
Tsaw ke lìyängu poru lefpoma trr. Fì’ut pol eromängum taluna fìtrrìri lu ‘awvea trr Numtsengeyä Sawtuteyä.
Fra’evi Omatikayaä a solalew zìsìt akinä tsun nivume tsatsengero. Tsaysì’eful leykamatängem frastuteti keftxo.
Tsamri a hu Tsayhetuwong ke längu fpom Na’viru…
Fratute txopu serängi furia Sawtute nirvängew fmivängi* skiva’a  tìtxurit soaiatisì Na’viyä alu tsayevi.
Tsaw lu Kawnga Unil fratute Omatikayaä. Slä tsatseng GraceKìreysìyä lu. Poe lu ‘eylan Na’viyä.
Omeium Neytiril futa Poel kawkrr ke tivung futa Samsiyul Sawtuteyä tìsraw seykivi evengit.

Pori lerängu meyp ulte ‘eferängu ohakxit. Fperìl tìtaronteri.
Omatikayaä ‘itel pìlme’eiun futa poe kivä hu psneyä Ikran alu Seze ne tìtaron fìtrr.
Set Tsahìktsyìp kerä ne Kelutral fte pivängkxo hu Mo’at Neytiriyä sì’efuteri ulte maw tìpuslltxe poe nìyevew kivä fte tivareion hu Seze.
Fìsäfpìlìl sleykìmeiu poti nìtram. Fìkrr ke lu som poru.
Tseiun kiveiä nìwin kxamlä na’rìng fte pivate Kelku Na’viyä ulte ultxa siveiyi hu
Soaia eylansì psneyä. Sa’nu Neytiriyä alu Mo’at lu Tsahìk Omatikayaä. Poe yawne lu Neytirir.
Mo’at tìhawnu seri ‘iteru krr a poel tsasrungit kivin. Set Ney lu stum fyeyntu ulte lereiu alaksi fte slivu mipa Tsahìk olo’ä.
Txo nirvew slivu Nawma Sa’nok, poe zenänge ftxivängey muntxatanit. Ke neängw tsakem sivängi.

Krr a pol tsole’eia Kelutralit Na’viyä, tsaw teya seiyi poru. Swoka Ultral alu Kelku frapeyä sì frayioangä ulte tìhawnu seri fra’ur alu hapxì Eywa’evengä.
Neytiri kereiä ka few kxamtseng kelkuyä a sutel tok frakrr. Tsu’tey tìng nari poru. Kìlmä eo Poeri
-Ma Tsu’tey! Kameie Ngati.
-Ma Tsmuke, ngaru lu fpom srak?
-Srane. Lu 'Efu oe meyp slä lefpom.
-Ayoe txopu sìlmäng tsnì furia nga ke new tivok fìtsengit. Oeru txoa livu. Oeri tsap’alute sereiyi ngar. Oe ke namängew tìsraw seykivamängi sì’fumit ngeyä.
-Kea tìkin. Oeyä txoa leru ngaru, ma tsumkan. Slä tsakem rä’ä sivi kawkrr!- Pìmlltxe Neytiri
-Tam. Lu ngaru txele a tsari oe tsiveiun srung siveiyi ngar srak?
-Srane. Zene oe fwivew Tsahìkit. Ngal omum tsenget a poel tok, srak?
-Mo’at hu Samsiyu evisì kamä ne Numtseng Hetuwongä! Ngal terok fìtsengit hawngkrr nìhawng.- Tsaw lu lora aylì’u a Tsu’tey pìmeng

Neytiri nerängew tsngivawvängìk… Slä set olo’ lu kxuke. Po tsun kivä fte tivaron. Kxawm tsakemìl sleykivu poti nìtram. Tìzawngìlìri* Sezeyä a poe stameiawm, tìmìng tìsìlpeyit poru.

So, nice job, but I want to talk about these so called "mood" infixes. They are truly overused here. Don't forget that they express only a speaker's attitude about a statement. Personally, I wouldn't use any here (except for the dialog part).
When the mirror speaks, the reflection lies.

Offline Tanri

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 1024
  • cz Czech Republic
  • Karma: 25
  • Mìkam aysanhì tìranyu.
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #4 on: June 01, 2011, 08:58:07 am »
Lu oeru säplltxevi teri ayhemlì’uvi alu <äng><ei>.
Tsayhemlì’uvil ralpeng tì’efut tuteyä a pol pereng tsavurit, tup tuteyä a poteri fko plltxe.

TS: oeri hawngkrr na frakrr ;)
« Last Edit: June 01, 2011, 08:59:58 am by Tanri »
Anything published exlusively on Discord (and not in this forum) does not exist...

Offline Sireayä mokri

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 6012
  • Karma: 35
  • Veritas vos liberabit
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #5 on: June 01, 2011, 09:15:46 am »
Lu oeru säplltxevi teri ayhemlì’uvi alu <äng><ei>.
Tsayhemlì’uvil ralpeng tì’efut tuteyä a pol pereng tsavurit, tup tuteyä a poteri fko plltxe.

Srane, ngaru tìyawr, tafral poltxe oe san solar tsat fkol nìhawng fìtseng, oe fpìl.
When the mirror speaks, the reflection lies.

Offline Tanri

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 1024
  • cz Czech Republic
  • Karma: 25
  • Mìkam aysanhì tìranyu.
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #6 on: June 01, 2011, 09:30:24 am »
Srane, oel ’efu tsat nìtengfya.
Ulte ’u alahe: aylì’uri alu "Fra’evi Omatikayaä a solalew zìsìt akinä tsun nivume tsatsengero", srake lu swey fwa fkol sar kemlì’ut alu tsun? Txo Neytiri ke zene kivä ne tsanumtseng, pelun pol olomum futa poru ke lìyu fpom tsatrr?
Anything published exlusively on Discord (and not in this forum) does not exist...

Offline Sireayä mokri

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 6012
  • Karma: 35
  • Veritas vos liberabit
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #7 on: June 01, 2011, 09:44:38 am »
Nìngay fpìl oel futa txo furia tok tsanumtsengit, 'efu fo keftxo nìtxan, tsakrr tsun fo 'ivì'awn kelkumì. Kxawm olo'eyktanìl new futa frrfen fol tsat srak?
When the mirror speaks, the reflection lies.

Offline Kamean

  • Eywatsyìp
  • ******
  • *
  • Posts: 10804
  • Karma: 64
  • Oe lu tute a tsun stivawm Eywayä mokrit
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #8 on: June 01, 2011, 04:15:31 pm »
Txantsana vur ulte sunu oer. :D
Tse'a ngal ke'ut a krr fra'uti kame.


Offline Alyara Arati

  • Eyktan
  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 2757
  • nv Eywa'eveng
  • Karma: 127
  • Arati te Nguran Liyanin'ite
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #9 on: June 02, 2011, 12:36:51 am »
Lu oeru yayayr nì'it.  Tsmuke Neytiriyä alu Sìlwanìn li lu kerusey srak? ???
Learn how to see.  Realize that everything connects to everything else.
~ Leonardo da Vinci

Offline Blue Elf

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 5502
  • cz Czech Republic
  • Karma: 112
    • My attempt for blog
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #10 on: June 02, 2011, 12:46:39 am »
Lu oeru yayayr nì'it.  Tsmuke Neytiriyä alu Silwanin li lu kerusey srak? ???
Peseng fko plltxe teri Silwanin? Did I read wrong way?
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Offline Alyara Arati

  • Eyktan
  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 2757
  • nv Eywa'eveng
  • Karma: 127
  • Arati te Nguran Liyanin'ite
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #11 on: June 02, 2011, 12:51:28 am »
Lu oeru yayayr nì'it.  Tsmuke Neytiriyä alu Silwanin li lu kerusey srak? ???
Peseng fko plltxe teri Silwanin? Did I read wrong way?
No, Silwanin is not mentioned at all.  Therefore I wondered if she were already dead, and that's why she isn't in the story, but this is just the way my imagination works sometimes. :-\
Learn how to see.  Realize that everything connects to everything else.
~ Leonardo da Vinci

Offline Eltusiyu

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 1088
  • nv Eywa'eveng
  • Karma: 13
    • Kxangangang!
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #12 on: June 02, 2011, 02:02:29 am »
About mood infixes.. I have forgotten their usage xP I had very hard school year and I couldn't learn Na'vi.
This part comes from December so I have to change it to write next one.

About Sylwanin. She lives. The strory begins when children of Omatikaya come to shool for first time.. So as I know it will be few months/years before the Movie.

This part is first version. I'll change it very much. But for now I want to learn more Na'vi. I have a gape which has taken me six months of learning this beautiful language. Then I will rebuild the Vur xP and make it more interesting :)

Kxangangang! - Oeyä Pìlok leNa'vi

Previously called Kxrekorikus

Offline Sireayä mokri

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 6012
  • Karma: 35
  • Veritas vos liberabit
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #13 on: June 02, 2011, 09:35:43 am »
Probably no need to remind you, but anyway, ask us if you got any questions or are not sure about something ;) Ulte tìnusumeri etrìpa syayvi ngar ;)
When the mirror speaks, the reflection lies.

Offline Tanri

  • Palulukan Makto
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 1024
  • cz Czech Republic
  • Karma: 25
  • Mìkam aysanhì tìranyu.
Re: Vur Kxrä- 'awvea Hapxì
« Reply #14 on: June 02, 2011, 09:51:51 am »
Ma Kxrekorikus, li vur ngeyä lu lor sì eltur tìtxen si nìtxan.
Ngian oel srefereiey nìprrte’ vurit amip. :)

Mì ayvur awngeyä, Silwanin sì Tsu’tey keng Trutì sì Kìrìys tsun rivey frakrr.
Anything published exlusively on Discord (and not in this forum) does not exist...

 

Become LearnNavi's friend on Facebook Follow LearnNavi on Twitter! Watch LearnNavi's videos on YouTube

SMF 2.0.18 | SMF © 2021, Simple Machines | XHTML | RSS | WAP2 | Site Rules

LearnNavi is not affiliated with the official Avatar website,
James Cameron, LightStorm Entertainment or The Walt Disney Company.
All trademarks and servicemarks are the properties of their respective owners.
Images in the LearnNavi.org Forums and Gallery may not be used without permission.

LearnNavi Affiliates:
ToS

LearnNavi is the community to learn Na'vi, the Avatar Language
"A place where real friendships are made." -Paul Frommer

AvatarMeet | Learn Na'vi Forum | Learn Na'vi Wiki | Na'viteri

LearnNavi