Lora Syulang (Rosenrot niNa'vi)

[Nawmway te Ramsute Txayo'ite]

This is my first big project involving Na'vi!  I love Rammstein, and love the Du Hast translation, so I decided to make my own with my favorite Rammstein song.

I'm aware that the translation is off in places, but I was going for rhythm and rhyme more than anything, and those fluent in the language will probably get the basic idea.

Spoiler

Syulangit tsame'a 'evel
Poe new tsat nìseykxel
Polawm pol yawnetut poä
Txo tsat poanil munge kayä

Poel new tsat, ulte nìltsan lu
Tsa fìfya lu, frakrr fìfya layu
Poel new tsat, lu fya krrä
Fra'u po new, slu poä

Oe zene taron ngimkrr
Txo txana smarit oel new
Lora syulang, oh, lora syulang
Poan zene lu txan tstew

Poan kä nefä tsawla ram 
Pol keran'ìn lu sat syulang
Po new tsilve'a 'eve
nitram lu, ha pol tsat munge

Poel new tsat, ulte nìltsan lu
Tsa fìfya lu, frakrr fìfya layu
Poel new tsat, lu fya krrä
Fra'u po new, slu poä

Oe zene taron ngimkrr
Txo txana smarit oel new
Lora syulang, oh, lora syulang
Poan zene lu txan tstew

Tskxe zup tengkrr po kä nefä
Po ke lirvu new fitsenge
Ulte zawng tung frapo omum
Mefo zerup kllte lu

Poel new tsat, ulte nìltsan lu
Tsa fìfya lu, frakrr fìfya layu
Poel new tsat, lu fya krrä
Fra'u po new, slu poä

Oe zene taron ngimkrr
Txo txana smarit oel new
Lora syulang, oh, lora syulang
Poan zene lu txan tstew

[Talis]

Ahh I know this song not sure if I can sing your translation... some parts were... strange to me... but first we got to get it into correct na'vi
nice work anyway I want you to sing the song when the translationwork is done

Syulangit tsame'a 'evel
Poel new tsat nìseykxel
Polawm pol yawnetutr poeyä
Txo tsat poaniìl munge kayä

Poel new tsat, ulte nìltsan lu
Tsaw fìfya lu, frakrr fìfya layu
Poel new tsat, lu fya krrä
Fra'ut pol new, slu poeyä

Oe zene tivaron ngimkrr txana krr
Txo txana smarit oel new
Lora syulang, oh, lora syulang
Poan zene livu nìtxan tstew

sorry got not more time now...

[Ftxavanga Txe′lan]

Oh wow, the final product is definitely going to be epic! I also like Rammstein very much.

[Nawmway te Ramsute Txayo'ite]

Regarding fya krrä, I couldn't find a word for tradition or custom, so I went with "time's way".

And thank you for your help!  I'll get on fixing some things.

[Talis]

"the way" is "fya'o"

[Nawmway te Ramsute Txayo'ite]

Irayo Talis!  I've made a pre-draft of the song just so I can show you how I'd like it sung as far as beat goes. 

(BTW, the "Pol keran'ìn lu sat syulang" is intentionally incorrect, as if I put "syulangit" I wouldn't be able to rhyme it.)

Lora Syulang.mp3

I had to make the song higher for my voice, as I'm female and my voice may be deep, but it can't go that low.

[Talis]

I'm male and can't go down that deep like Till Lindemann

Poan kä nefä tsawla ram
Pol keran'ìn lu sat syulangit
Po new tsilve'a 'eveti
(a) nitram lu, ha pol tsat munge

Poel new tsat, ulte nìltsan lu
Tsaw fìfya lu, frakrr fìfya layu
Poel new tsat, lu fya'o krrä
Fra'ut pol new, slu poeyä

Oe zene tivaron ngimkrr txana krr
Txo txana smarit oel new
Lora syulang, oh, lora syulang
Poan zene livu nìtxan tstew

Tskxe zup tengkrr po kerä nefä
Po ke lirvu new fitsenge
Ulte zawng tung frapo omum ->ulte tìzusawng oeyktìng fraporu
Mefo'evan sì syulang zerup ne kllte lu

sorry got not more time now. oh and it isn't singable in this corrected form, I think you have to work at some parts again do regain that.

ah and by the way: don't forget the ejectives and Glottalstops when you're singing this rest sounded fine to me keep on!

[Le'eylan]

Nang fì'u oer sunu nìtxan!
Wow I really like this!

['Oma Tirea]

ah and by the way: don't forget the ejectives and Glottalstops when you're singing this rest sounded fine to me keep on!

Although the gentler the singing, the more likely those four consonants are likely to be lenited (at least a little), so that the song flows a little better.

[Talis]

take the beautiful ejectives away just because of the flow? ... no! 
especially by Rammstein it should be ok to sing them in full strength

of course some times it sound strange - but this is Na'vi, I think we shouldn't adapt it just it because it don't "flow" enough in our human ears, maybe the Na'vi would think about that completely different.

[Talis]

Last stanzas are just repetition so they're  same as the other corrected versions

so now you just got to record a new, corrected version - if it's possible to sing this corrected version

[Blue Elf]

Really good ! Although meaning and grammar suffer by mistakes , it sounds well with rhymes!!
Have you new version recorded? I agree with Talis - ejectives must be sung correctly, othervise many of the Na'vi magic is lost...