Author Topic: Ngaru Lu 'Eylan - James Taylor  (Read 967 times)

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Offline Alyara Arati

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Ngaru Lu 'Eylan - James Taylor
« on: November 30, 2012, 02:20:21 am »


aylì'u leNa'vi - fpìl oel futa kxawm lu hasey set
(not every syllable matches, but I think it's singable if you always squeeze "ulte" into one note)

Krra ‘efu keftxo, ulte kin srungiti ngal
ulte kekem, o kekem ke si nìyawr.
Fpìl nga oeteri, ulte oe pìsyähem
fte tivìng atanit mì ngeyä ton.

Nì’aw syaw nga oeru, ulte tsengftu a oel terok
tìsyul ngane, (nìmun), fte tsive’a ngat.
Ftxey lu som fu wew set, zene nga syivaw nì’aw, ulte ngahu tìsyok nang
lu ngar ‘eylan.

Txo frataw io nga slivu vawm, lewopx, sì tstu
ulte hufwe sì tompa ‘eko nìhawng,
rä’ä lopx ta txopu, ulte oeru syaw nìwok.
Ngar sìsyim fte kiyeväteng.

Nì’aw syaw nga oeru, ulte tsengftu a oel terok
tìsyul ngane, (nìmun), fte tsive’a ngat.
Ftxey lu som fu wew set, zene nga syivaw nì’aw, ulte ngahu tìsyok nang…

Srak sìltsan leiu fwa ngar smon ‘eylan?  Aysute tsun livu fkay.
Txayìng ngat fol mì sìsraw.  Fmayi mivunge fo vitrat
o slä rä’ä tung tsat.

Nì’aw syaw nga oeru, ulte tsengftu a oel terok
tìsyul ngane, fte tsive’a ngat.
Ftxey lu som fu wew set, zene nga syivaw nì’aw, ulte ngahu tìsyok nang
lu ngar ‘eylan.  Ngar lu ‘eylan.
Srak sìltsan leiu fwa ngar smon ‘eylan?  Srak sìltsan leiu fwa ngar smon ‘eylan?  
O srane, lu ngar ‘eylan.
« Last Edit: December 05, 2012, 02:37:38 am by Alyara Arati »
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Offline Blue Elf

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Re: Ngaru Lu 'Eylan - James Taylor
« Reply #1 on: November 30, 2012, 06:03:01 pm »
Very nice, ma Alyara. Your translations are always great and it is pleasure to read them. And even make it singable - that's piece of real art.

Some ideas and corrections:
Quote
Nì’aw syaw ngal oeru, ulte peseng tsengftu a oel terok
tìsyul ngane, fte tsive’a ngat (nìmun).
Syaw is intransitive, so agentive is not necessary (more occurrences of this mistake).
Peseng is strange here, it sounds like "where I am will run to you (the place I occupy will run to you)", but desired meaning is "(I) will run from place I occupy to you", if I understand well.
Quote
Ftxey lu som fu(ftxey?) wew set
Quote
Nì’aw syaw ngal oeru, ulte tsengo a oel terok
tìsyul ngane
again, it sounds like the place will run to you, not me.... ???

Still great work! Thanks
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Offline Alyara Arati

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Re: Ngaru Lu 'Eylan - James Taylor
« Reply #2 on: November 30, 2012, 06:30:12 pm »
I'm open to suggestions on how to make it not sound like the place I am will run to you.  I will continue to think about it, of course, but if you have any ideas, that would be great! ???

Also, I put (nìmun) in the middle of that line because the singer inserts an "oh yeah babe" into the lyrics there, and I felt like I should replace that with something. ::)

As always, thank you so much; you are my best, and usually only, proofreader and comment-maker.  What would I do without your help? :D
Learn how to see.  Realize that everything connects to everything else.
~ Leonardo da Vinci

Offline Blue Elf

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Re: Ngaru Lu 'Eylan - James Taylor
« Reply #3 on: November 30, 2012, 06:43:24 pm »
I'm open to suggestions on how to make it not sound like the place I am will run to you.  I will continue to think about it, of course, but if you have any ideas, that would be great! ???
Tsengftu doesn't fit well? Syllable count is the same...
Quote
As always, thank you so much; you are my best, and usually only, proofreader and comment-maker.  What would I do without your help?
Writing without readers is not so amusing; I feel the same.... But reader without writers is lost completely :o
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Offline Alyara Arati

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Re: Ngaru Lu 'Eylan - James Taylor
« Reply #4 on: November 30, 2012, 06:54:54 pm »
Wow!  I completely did not see that, although now it seems obvious.  Thanks! ;D
Learn how to see.  Realize that everything connects to everything else.
~ Leonardo da Vinci

Offline hemmond

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Re: Ngaru Lu 'Eylan - James Taylor
« Reply #5 on: March 12, 2013, 01:16:35 pm »
Well... I read this all. :) Looking forward to hear the audio. :) I can't wait. :) I really like this song an I'd love to see that sung in Na'vi. :)
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