Author Topic: Sian tsmukan oeyä lu - kids' book translation  (Read 644 times)

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Offline Kiliyä

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Sian tsmukan oeyä lu - kids' book translation
« on: January 24, 2010, 05:23:41 am »
Sian tsmukan oeyä lu
My Brother Sean


1. Sian nìfrakrr namew ne numetseng kivä.
Sean ADV-every-time want-PAST to learn-place go-SUBJ
Sean always wanted to go to school.

2. Vay aysrr apxay, Sa'nul sì oel poanit mamunge ne srungtseng ayevengä.
Before PL-day ADJ-many, Mum-ERG and I-ERG he-ACC take-PAST to help-place PL-child-GEN
Then one day Mum and me took him to the nursery.

3. Sian nguway si.
Sean howl make
Sean cried.

4. Poanìl nì'awve hì'ia txoput 'efu,
He-ERG first bit-ADJ fear-ACC feel
At first he was only shy,

5. slä tsakrr moe zene piveng san kìveyame sìk,
but that-time we-TWO must speak-SUBJ (quote) good-bye
but when it was time for us to say good-bye,

6. Sian nguway si.
Sean howl make
Sean cried.

7. Karyu asìltsan Sianur peng san pxay ayevi le'eylan ayoeru lu.
Teacher ADJ-good Sean-DAT tell (quote) many PL-kid ADJ-friend we-EXCL-DAT be
“We've got lots of nice kids,” said the kind teacher to Sean.

8. Sa'nu peng san sì ayul a prrte' tìng.
Mum tell-PAST (quote) and PL-thing which pleasure give
“And lots of toys,” said Mum.

9. Oe peng san ulte ayau for nìteng lu.
I tell (quote) and PL-drum they-DAT also be.
“And they've got a swing (drums...), too,” I said.

10. San sì pa'lit mivakto sìk peng 'evenganìl a new 'eylan livu.
(quote) and dire-horse-ACC ride-SUBJ (unquote) tell boy-ERG which want friend be-SUBJ
“And a donkey for riding,” said a boy who wanted to be friends.

11. Sianìl lrrtok nì'it hì'ia lrrti.
Sean-ERG smile-PAST ADV-bit small-ADJ smile-ACC.
Sean smiled a teeny weeny smile.

12. Ha Sa'nu sì oe poanit txìng mì numetseng.
So Mum and I he-ACC leave-PAST in learn-place
So Mum and me left him at school.

There's obviously a few difficulties here.  One is that the transitivity of certain verbs is called into question, like peng and txìng specifically.  I'm also a little unsure if I used a right, and whether subordinate clauses can be imbeded as I did in line 10.  Vocab begin what it is, "swing" was out, as was "toys", but I tried to make do.  The use of eo as a temporal thing is also up for debate!  (Feel free to raise any other issues that you might have.  I'll be trying to make a recording of this at some point in the future, so comments and critique would be appreciated.)

1st Edit: implemented most changes suggested by omängum (irayo!), but kept 'u as thing.
« Last Edit: January 24, 2010, 06:15:46 am by Kiliyä »
Peu sa'nokyä ayoengyä?  Pefya ayoeng poeru kìte'e sayi?
Pefya ayoengìl poeti hayawnu, na poel ayoengit hawnu?

What of our mother?  How shall we serve her?  How shall we protect her as she protects us?

Offline omängum fra'uti

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Re: Sian tsmukan oeyä lu - kids' book translation
« Reply #1 on: January 24, 2010, 05:59:36 am »
Quote
1. Sian nìfrakrr zamene ne numetseng kivä.
Sean always had to go to school (zene = must, new = want)
Quote
2. Eo aysrr apxay, Sa'nul sì oel poanit mamunge ne srungtseng ayevengä.
It seems to me "eo" might be positional, while vay would be the temporal equivelent, however the exact definition of vay isn't fully attested.  Also, since you've already established the past tense, you probably don't need to keep stating it.  (This goes for all future lines.)
Quote
5. slä tsakrr moe zamene pivlltxe san kìveyame,
I'm getting the feeling that "peng" might be what they'd use for "say"...  As in "piveng sanit kìyevame sìk" (VERY speculative there...) sort of like you did in line 7
Quote
7. Karyu asìltsan Sianur pameng san pxay ayevi le'eylan fìtsengmì tok.
More speculation but I suspect tok would be transitive with the accusative being the location, but others disagree with me there.  However less and less people are disagreeing with the dative possessive, so it's probably pretty safe to make that quote...
"Ayoe pxay (ay)evi le'eylan fìtsengmi lu" (We have many friendly kids in here)
Quote
8. Sa'nu pameng san sì ayul a prrte' tìng.
As much as I've suggested 'u might be thing in the past, it is quite unattested, and if there is a word that is just "thing", it might have been contracted the same way "fya'o" becomes fya.
Quote
9. Oe pameng san ulte ayau fìtseng nìteng tok.
Again with the possessive dative "Foru ayau nìteng lu"
Quote
10. San sì pa'lit mivakto sìk 'evenganìl a namew 'eylan sivu pameng.
Typo on "livu".  Also I'd move "peng" to before or after 'evenganìl.  It may be fine the way you have it, but I'm not 100% sure.
Quote
11. Sianìl lamrrtok nì'it hì'ia lrrti.
Without context, we actually don't know if "lrrtok" is a noun or verb.  While it does appear it might follow the X+verb construct with tok, if that is indeed the case, the infix would just go in tok...  Lrrtamok.  Except that as I said above, past tense is already contextually understood, so the infix isn't really needed to begin with.
« Last Edit: January 24, 2010, 06:01:40 am by omängum fra'uti »
Ftxey lu nga tokx ftxey lu nga tirea? Lu oe tìkeftxo.
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