Make a Wish, Make it Useless!!!!

Started by Tseymsì, April 15, 2011, 05:03:54 PM

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Tìtstewan

But you have only those two free days.

I wish I have a job...

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archaic

You get a job, but you have to travel 3 hours to get there on an over crowded bus. The building is vast, cold, drafty, and leaks when ever it rains, the smell from toilets is all pervading, you work on the top floor, and the elevator hasn't worked since 1967. Did I mention that the stairs are steep and not real safe?
You hate the work, none of your colleagues will speak to you as you have replaced someone who everyone liked, was immensely gifted in their work and respected hugely. They were also generous to a fault, and gave their money and time to several hardworking but seriously unglamorous charities. They also had an awesome sense of humor and simply radiated charm, charisma and cool. They had an almost supernatural ability to make great coffee from anything that came to hand.
The boss hates you, takes credit for any good work you do, as the newbie you get all the worst work, you get shouted at relentlessly for mistakes that you didn't make. Your supervisor is secretly trying to sabotage you at every opportunity, to make themselves look good in the hope of promotion.
Your line manager is a workplace bully and makes everyone's lives a living hell continuously, the previous supervisor had a breakdown and shot himself - while pulling yet another unpaid all nighter- while sat at the small desk next to the toilets. Your desk is small and next to the toilets, your chair is uncomfortable, your lunch break is too short to reach the break room (located in the sub basement) and return to your desk, let alone eat while there.
Your journey home is usually long after midnight and you share the train with drug addicts, drunks and the incontinent homeless.
You are routinely expected to work all nighters and weekends, as you are on a salary all of these are unpaid.



I wish all bosses had to be fair and reasonable by law.
Pasha, an Avatar story, my most recent fanfic, Avatar related, now complete.

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Blue Elf

Quote from: archaic on February 16, 2014, 02:39:48 PM
You get a job, but you have to travel 3 hours to get there on an over crowded bus. The building is vast, cold, drafty, and leaks when ever it rains, the smell from toilets is all pervading, you work on the top floor, and the elevator hasn't worked since 1967. Did I mention that the stairs are steep and not real safe?
You hate the work, none of your colleagues will speak to you as you have replaced someone who everyone liked, was immensely gifted in their work and respected hugely. They were also generous to a fault, and gave their money and time to several hardworking but seriously unglamorous charities. They also had an awesome sense of humor and simply radiated charm, charisma and cool. They had an almost supernatural ability to make great coffee from anything that came to hand.
The boss hates you, takes credit for any good work you do, as the newbie you get all the worst work, you get shouted at relentlessly for mistakes that you didn't make. Your supervisor is secretly trying to sabotage you at every opportunity, to make themselves look good in the hope of promotion.
Your line manager is a workplace bully and makes everyone's lives a living hell continuously, the previous supervisor had a breakdown and shot himself - while pulling yet another unpaid all nighter- while sat at the small desk next to the toilets. Your desk is small and next to the toilets, your chair is uncomfortable, your lunch break is too short to reach the break room (located in the sub basement) and return to your desk, let alone eat while there.
Your journey home is usually long after midnight and you share the train with drug addicts, drunks and the incontinent homeless.
You are routinely expected to work all nighters and weekends, as you are on a salary all of these are unpaid.
And YOU say you aren't good writer? ;D At least good wish destroyer  :D ;D :) ;)

Quote
I wish all bosses had to be fair and reasonable by law.
Well, they are as law requires it. But as small compensation it allows them to be ugly, rude and unpleasant to the employees once per three months - what they use with pleasure... on you.

I wish my working hours were flexible in both directions (normally they are extended only, shortening seem impossible)
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


Swoka Ikran

They are, but you get paid hourly and don't get overtime.

I wish the school semester would go by faster.
2010 was the year of the Na'vi.Vivar 'ivong Na'vi!


 
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Tìtstewan

Yes, they are go fast, but you still have to learn.


I wish I could sleep...

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Swoka Ikran

Quote from: Tìtstewan on February 24, 2014, 09:53:49 PM
8 semesters = 4 years?!
Yeah...8 semesters over here. Usually about 16 weeks long plus a week for exams. Two per year (fall and spring), and you're off for 3 months in the summer.

Thinking of it now, it's hard to believe I joined this forum before I started college...and I graduate in 10 weeks.

Quote from: Tìtstewan on February 24, 2014, 09:53:49 PM
I wish I could sleep...

You can, because you took sleeping pills. Unfortunately they're too effective and you sleep through the next 2 days.
2010 was the year of the Na'vi.Vivar 'ivong Na'vi!


 
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archaic

Pasha, an Avatar story, my most recent fanfic, Avatar related, now complete.

The Dragon Affair my last fanfic, non Avatar related.

Swoka Ikran

Oops. :-[

I wish every song on iTunes was free.
2010 was the year of the Na'vi.Vivar 'ivong Na'vi!


 
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archaic

iTunes goes bust, destroying the music industry as we know it.
New music only gets made by amateurs, production quality is variable, but generally poor. Many aspiring musicians are forced to take poorly paid blue collar jobs to pay bills which leaves them little time or money to work on their sounds, further reducing over all quality.
Only a few rich kids can afford good equipment and the time to devote to music, but mostly they produce self indulgent ego trips and most of them sound truly awful.


I wish everyone had the opportunity to explore their talents.
Pasha, an Avatar story, my most recent fanfic, Avatar related, now complete.

The Dragon Affair my last fanfic, non Avatar related.

Tìtstewan

But you have not the time for that.

I wish, I could have much more ideas...

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archaic

Wish granted, now you have an over active imagination, problems focusing o anyone thing more more than a few seconds, you find it impossible to remember all the good ideas among the lousy ones, and the confusion this causes leads you sometimes to struggle to tell the difference anyways. Welcome to my world!



I wish I had a better memory.
Pasha, an Avatar story, my most recent fanfic, Avatar related, now complete.

The Dragon Affair my last fanfic, non Avatar related.

Rotobull cz

You can get it.

You can start with some memory exercises. There are hundreds of informations and advices about it.
I saw some man, who had to learn something like: 10100110010101010011010101010101010100110101010101010101010101001100101010010101010100110010110010100001011110110100 - in 1 minute and then he wrote it with no mistakes.
He said, that he's not some genius, he's just doing some memory exercises and making some memory ways.

For example: http://www.helpguide.org/life/improving_memory.htm
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archaic

I have a head full of a life time's memories, and while it is less than when I was young, a mind that is often filled with random creative ideas (usually totally unrelated to what I am trying to remember/focus on).
I can remember many details from my high school days, yet what I did last Friday is largely a blank.
My memory really sucks!
Pasha, an Avatar story, my most recent fanfic, Avatar related, now complete.

The Dragon Affair my last fanfic, non Avatar related.

Blue Elf

Quote from: archaic on March 10, 2014, 04:41:37 PM
I have a head full of a life time's memories, and while it is less than when I was young, a mind that is often filled with random creative ideas (usually totally unrelated to what I am trying to remember/focus on).
I can remember many details from my high school days, yet what I did last Friday is largely a blank.
My memory really sucks!
Similar to me - typically when my wife asks me what I had for lunch, I really have no idea. I'm only sure I had a lunch.
Back to topic:
You have perfect memory which easily remember everything you've seen and heard. Most of these information are on the other hand completely useless and block you brain, so can hardly perform simple tasks like eating, going to the toilet or cleaning teeth, so you need assistant to care about you. You great memory ruins your life....

I wish my attempt to find different job was successful.
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


archaic

You get a job as a security guard at a military base in Eastern Ukraine.
You never get bored, you no longer feel that breaks are to short, you no longer worry about your retirement, going bald, the long term effects of smoking or alcohol consumption. Or debilitating diseases in later life either.



I wish for a peaceful resolution for the situation there.
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The Dragon Affair my last fanfic, non Avatar related.

Tìtstewan

There was a peaceful resolution, but it was more like a turbo-resolution which looks kinda faked.


I wish some politicans would have more brain...

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Blue Elf

Quote from: Tìtstewan on March 23, 2014, 09:35:26 PM
There was a peaceful resolution, but it was more like a turbo-resolution which looks kinda faked.


I wish some politicans would have more brain...
They've got bigger brain, but..... bigger brain doesn't mean better ideas, so they're still useless as before....

I wish.... to have something reasonable to wish :)
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


archaic

You do, it's an excellent wish, and none could argue that it is in any way frivolous or misjudged. However, two devious, malevolent, trouble making nantang hijack the wish, corrupting it's intent and warping it's focus, leaving a vile and retched perversion of the original wish, that leaves all who read it reaching for the brain bleach.




I wish I could ruin wishes in a good way, like I used to be able to.
Pasha, an Avatar story, my most recent fanfic, Avatar related, now complete.

The Dragon Affair my last fanfic, non Avatar related.

Blue Elf

I think you are still good in this area, but train hard, one day someone better can appear. :)

I wish I'll do right decision on Monday. I still have no idea what to do (but there's chance decision will not be necessary). Hard situation.
Oe lu skxawng skxakep. Slä oe nerume mi.
"Oe tasyätxaw ulte koren za'u oehu" (Limonádový Joe)


archaic

Monday happened, events came to pass.


I wish Blue Elf would let us know what happened.
Pasha, an Avatar story, my most recent fanfic, Avatar related, now complete.

The Dragon Affair my last fanfic, non Avatar related.